Blue Haven Reviews

Movie Review: Dracula 3000

2012-01-20T18:18:00.000-08:00

This movie could have been fun, even as a ‘so bad its good kind of feature’. Unfortunately, everything about this movie feels off, sometimes being a comedy, sometimes trying to be a drama, but mostly ending up as a snooze fest. Dracula himself doesn’t show up until halfway through the movie, and we have to suffer some very annoying lines of dialogue before then. The cast and crew don’t seem to gel that well together, and it really shows in their lines of dialogue together. Other times they just appear to be lost. For example, there are two scenes in a row where two different characters mistakenly shoot at their comrades, thinking that they are a vampire.

Plot threads also appear but don’t really go anywhere. The Captain’s name is Van Heilsing but it’s not significant (although, points to the movie for not making him invincible either). Another crew member is a super-strong robot, but doesn’t actually have any fighting scenes, often running away to get help. The absolute worst part is the ending. Having a good ending where the good guys win I can enjoy. Having a bad ending where all the characters dies I can also enjoy. Having a bad ending where all the characters die-yet somehow they know this hours in advance and spend their time shagging is not something I do enjoy.

FINAL GRADE: 1 star out of 5. It picks up when Dracula appears, but for the most part it’s easily forgettable.

Other name drops include: one of the characters called Mina Murray, and the ship recently picked up cargo from Transylvania.

Game Review: Skyrim

2011-12-18T22:01:00.000-08:00

Skyrim.

I really can't stop playing this game.

I had some initial reluctance playing Skyrim for two reasons-one, I wasn’t really in the fantasy role-playing mood at the time, and two, it was developed by Bethesda Software, who recently broke my heart with Fallout 3: Las Vegas. Seriously, that game is riddled with so many bugs it’s virtually unplayable.

Despite that, I did a casual play-through, and after that I was immediately hooked. The plot is this: you are an unknown peasant picked up by the Imperial army, who decide to execute you simply because you were in the vicinity of some rebels. But then a dragon appears and crashes the execution party. And as luck will have it, you are one of the chosen ‘Dragonborn’, who can suck out the souls of any dragons you slay and gain their power. Boy, egg is on the Imperial’s face.

What makes Skyrim so appealing? For starters, the game is massive, often riddled with quests every five minutes. Thankfully most of the quests don’t get repetitive either. I say ‘most’ of the time, because every now and then it feels like there is one undead crypt too many. But the voice acting is consistently different, and there is a certain degree of fun. You can also get married, become a thief, conquer a town, attend college, become a werewolf, cure your lycanthrope, and become a vampire instead. Although, why you would do that, I have no idea. Because, you know, vampires kind of suck in this game.

Is it riddled with bugs? Well, I’m not going to give Bethesda a free pass on this. There are a couple of glitches here and there, but not anything that breaks the game. More often than not it’ll be amusing, such as a Woolly Mammoth falling out of the sky.

I’ve been playing this game for probably a month and still haven’t gotten close to winning it. Is it worth your month? Hell yeah. Can I give it a negative critique on anything? Um...okay I need to think about this...with so many quests going on, it’s kind of hard to get emotionally invested in the plot. Fallout 3 Las Vegas appealed to me because it was primarily about a group of soldiers who were fighting against a master race, determined to cleanse the world of sin. The horrors many of these soldiers went through made it far more interesting. In Skyrim, the little guy going against the evil big army is just a minor side-plot in five million other sideplots. It’s a very minor gripe, though, and I won’t hold them against it.

Final grade: 5 stars out of 5. I can’t wait to see how this game ends!

Slow updates

2011-12-18T21:32:00.000-08:00

Hi guys,

Sorry for the slow updates-been a really busy time while I focus on edits for War of the Soulites 3 and Autumn's Spirit-not to mention planning a wedding in five months! Will try to update more.

Cheers,
Natasha

Cover Art for War of the Soulites 3!

2011-11-14T17:12:00.000-08:00

Hi guys,

Here is the cover for War of the Soulites 3! As usual my publisher has done a spectacular job. Synopsis to follow at some point soon! :)

Game Review: Batman: Arkham City

2011-10-30T16:49:00.000-07:00

Since being released, Batman: Arkham City has gotten several favourable reviews from Metacritic and Playstation, not to mention several thousand fans. So bring on the hatemail, because I am probably the only person in the universe who didn't like this one.

Okay, maybe that was too harsh. Let me rephrase-I liked it, but not nearly as much as Batman: Arkham Asylum. The plot is this-following the events of the first game, Doctor Hugo Strange converts Arkham Asylum into a massive city. Doctor Strange is also doubly dangerous, since he knows Batman is Bruce Wayne and captures him from the start.

The more I think about Arkham City, the more I have to ask a question-what exactly is Gotham City smoking? They put serial killers and lunatics in a city, unrestrained and with zero supervision. And it really is zero supervision, because in the game they form gangs, try to murder each other, and Hugo Strange shrugs and says, ‘Screw it. Let them fight it out.’ Strange then bestows inhumane conditions such as limited food, forcing many to starve. Do you still have your suspension o f disbelief? Okay, how about Hugo Strange arrests Bruce Wayne and several politicians and toss them into the mix as well. I understand Hugo’s plan for doing this, which ultimately is pretty brilliant, but did he really think this wouldn’t get some attention from Gotham City? Hugo Strange must have hired himself a pretty good PR man.

Most of the combat system, enemy AI, graphics, and voice acting remains the same, which is admittedly pretty awesome. Batman also gets a few new gadgets. So, what could I possibly hate about this game? For starters, the first game had these mystery items called Riddler troppies, which Batman has to retrieve. It was pretty cool, but in the sequel it’s now too much of a good thing. They’ve quadrupled to a point where Batman trips over the damn things every five feet, most of which he can’t even get until he finds the right upgrade. There are four hundred of these suckers, some of which I don’t think is even accessible after certain parts of the game. Let me put if this way-when the game becomes a chore rather than something fun, it gets boring pretty fast. So, congratulations Riddler, you beat me this time.

Overall, the game felt way too fast, and I finished the main plots and most of the side plots within a week (I swear to god, one of them involved either resetting the date on my PS3 or playing the game on certain days of the year). Plus, the lack of scarecrow is sorely missed and the enemy chatter can be annoying.

FINAL GRADE: 3 ½ out of 5 stars. It's not a bad game-in fact it's far better than several currently out there. I just think the first one is a little bit better.

It’s too bad Batman didn’t have Bat-shark repellent during one stage of the game.

Game Review: Dead Island

2011-10-15T09:45:00.000-07:00

Like most people, I bought this game not because I knew what it would be like, but for one reason only-the incredibly awesome but sad trailer.

Yeah, that one *sniff*.

So how does the actual game measure up? Well, the graphics are detailed and stunning, the enemies are tough and also decent, there is plenty of environment to explore and the voice acting is pretty good.

So why am I still scratching my head and not thinking this is a good game?

The player can start as one of four different characters, each one a different personality and different skill sets. In the cutscenes all four players are working together. Considering they either didn’t know each other or hated each other in the beginning, they are working together...because, um...because! And they are all immune to the zombie virus...um, because!

So why don’t I like this game? One thing that hurts this game considerably is the lack of a tutorial system in the beginning. I spent an embarrassing long time trying to follow an objective, when I realized I was following a compass direction. Secondly, it’s very long-probably two or three times longer than other games I’ve bought recently. The enemies are also numerous and respawn. A lot. And if the players upgrade, the zombies upgrade with you. You might think that it’s natural to have that in a zombie game, but it is a little frustrating to have a player is fully armed with all sorts of cool abilities, only to die three seconds later from one elbow from a zombie. Actually it’s more than frustrating-both myself and my significant other quit playing a couple of times due to the steep difficulty curve. I strongly recommend running through some sections (especially the city) instead of trying to tackle every single enemy that comes your way.

You might have noticed I haven’t said much about the plot. Well...eh, it’s a zombie story, so what do you expect? There are some clichés here and there especially towards the end, and I don’t think parts of it are developed as well as they could have, especially in the jungle section. I also find it odd that the only people who are immune to the virus are not locked away in a vault somewhere having testing done of them, instead of doing every side mission imaginable in a hostile world where they can still easily die. And shockingly when they do go to a lab the scientist does not develop a cure by sampling their blood, but instead by the players kidnapping some native girl (and that in itself really does not go well).

Final Grade: 3 1/2 out of 5. A rich resort world that’s pretty to look at, but the annoying difficulty makes it tough to stick around. Fallout 3 mastered this a lot better.

Every time I died, I woke up with a surprisingly lighter wallet. What, are the zombies hard up on cash?

Author Interview: M.R Gott

2011-10-09T17:12:00.000-07:00

Today on Blue Haven Reviews I am interviewing M.R Gott. M.R. Gott is the author of the novel Where the Dead fear to Tread and the forthcoming sequel Where the Damned Seek Closure. You can visit M.R. at his website Cutis Anserina at http://wherethedeadfeartotread.blogspot.com. Aside from contacting M.R. you will find his collection of book reviews and a list of small horror films you may have missed. M.R. lives contentedly in central New Hampshire with his wife, and their three pets. Aside from writing M.R. enjoys dark coffee, dark beer and fading light

N.B: Tell me about yourself. How long have you been writing? When you’re not writing, how do

you like to spend your free time?

M.R Gott: In elementary school we used to write our own stories and I never truly stopped. It was not until

recently though that I was able to finish a narrative. In my free time I enjoy stories, whether they

be in film or literature. There are countless books and movies I want to experience but again

time gets the better of me.

N.B: Can you tell us about your Novel, Where the Dead Fear to Tread?

M.R Gott: Where the Dead Fear to Tread combines two genres I am very fond of, supernatural horror

with elements from detective noir and old pulp heroes. To me there was no better character

to navigate a dark encompassing world than the cynical pragmatists created by men such as

Dashiell Hammett and Raymond Chandler. The characters they created saw the world as it was,

and despite their status as outsiders found success in meeting their goals.

The early Anita Blake novels by Laurell K Hamilton were greatly influential to me. I saw Anita

in these books as a well armed throwback to Sam Spade and Phillip Marlowe. She was smart

and brutally efficient. I later lost interest in the series, not for the increasing and lengthy sexual

elements, but for Anita’s increased supernatural powers. When I left Anita she was no longer

the underdog hounded by disrespectful authority figures, she was giving commands to legions of

followers.

N.B: What was your favourite scene to write? What was your least favourite scene?

M.R Gott: No single scene was my favorite to write. My favorite scenes to write are the quiet reflective

moments between the scenes of carnage. It is in these scenes when I truly get to create the

character and show who they are. It is not always actions that define us, but how we react to our

own actions. I believe when recognized it is the small moments that are the most important in

character building.

My least favorite scene to write was in Where the Damned Fear Redemption, the sequel to

Where the Dead Fear to Tread. It is a crucial scene revolving around family violence where

my protagonist needs to be emotionally destroyed. I feel I accomplished this well by taking the

small comforts that parents can provide and warping them into acts of aggression.

N.B: What inspires you to write? (music, books, etc)

M.R Gott: No single element inspires me, to me it is trying to devise stories that articulate the way I see

the world. It may be dark and overbearing at times, it is our charge to acknowledge the small

unexploited potentials for good. This is what defines us.

N.B: Do you have other upcoming projects in the works?

M.R Gott: I have recently completed a manuscript for Where the Damned Fear Redemption. I have a

collection of short stories I am working toward releasing, as well as a couple other story outlines.

N.B: Any advice for beginning writers that are trying to get published?

M.R Gott: When you are offered advice or suggestions by professionals, listen.Even if you disagree you

may learn something from just interacting with them that you can use.

N.B: What is the best way for readers to contact you? (website, e-mail, facebook, twitter, etc)

M.R Gott: I am be contacted through goodreads.com at http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/

Synopsis:

Where The Dead Fear To Tread

Description: A police officer and a serial killer search separately for a missing child while running a
malevolent labyrinth populated by creatures they never knew existed.

Former prosecutor William Chandler, disgusted with his past inaction, spills the blood of those
who victimize children to correct the ills he sees in the world. A self-admitted serial killer and
uncomfortable with his actions, Chandler attends the funerals of those whose lives he has taken
in an effort to retain a true understanding of the nature of violence.

The carnage left in his wake is investigated by Detective Kate Broadband, who becomes
progressively more comfortable with the corpses left by Chandler. Envying the power she sees in
him, she pursues Chandler as each search for Maria Verde, a missing eight-year-old girl.

As Chandler and Broadband draw closer to discovering what happened to Maria they are forced
to confront The Devourer, an unnatural being trafficking in stolen children.

Where the Dead Fear to Tread is a tale of hard-boiled macabre, bridging numerous genres to
reveal a story of horror, crime and revenge.

Available from the Untreed Reads Store, Amazon and most major e-book retailers for $4.99

Webseries Review: Machine of Death: Part two

2011-09-25T15:06:00.000-07:00

Ever since I did my first review of ‘The Machine of Death’ webseries more videos have come up, and I have been requested to do another review of the series.

For those who missed my first review, the machine of death is a new state-of-the art system which can tell a person how they are going to die by taking a sample of their blood. The system does not mention the date, and the meaning can sometimes be a little vague. Still, it was an interesting concept...and in the later episodes, it still is.

Of course, much of these videos depend on how good the actor or actress can be monologuing for ten or twenty minutes straight. Since there are eight different videos with eight different actors, your opinion may vary. If I had to pick a favourite, mine would probably be episode five, ‘together’, where a couple believe they are predicted to die together, so they try to spend time apart instead.

One drawback of these videos is that for a couple of them a feel like there is a hidden or clever ending I am supposed to get. While most of the time I do, sometimes I feel like it slips me by, and I’m kind of left hanging. I’m not sure if this is a reflection of the video or myself, however. From a more technical standpoint, most of them are shot very well, but one might see a moment of two of shaky-cam.

In short? I would recommend giving these videos a look, and I would also not recommend having things in the background at the same time. These are the kind of videos that deserve your complete attention.

All of these videos can be found at http://orpheos.co.uk/machineofdeath/. There's also a convient machine of death on the website. Let's try mine...wait, Electrified Elephant? What the hell?

Current Writing Projects: September 2011

2011-09-11T08:37:00.000-07:00

Hi guy,

I've been debating for a while where to put the 'current projects' status on this blog. I think I'll probably just make it into a post once a month or whenever I have new information and go from there. So.....

War of the Soulites 3: This has been accepted by the publisher. We're still in the prelimary editing stages with this one. It'll be a while before I can give you more info for this.

Autumn's Spirit: This has also been accepted by the publisher. We've gone through the first editing stages so we should be finished it fairly soon (fingers crossed!).

D.r.e.x: Blackout (working title)-After some debating I've decided that this is going to be my next big project to finish. Basically it's a spy/supernatural horror novel which I am actively considering sending to Tor (eep!). Current word count: 32, 727 words.

Fantasy Novel (untitled). My next big project, probably going to either Tor or Edge Publishing. Currently gathering dust at 17, 857 words.

Sci-fi Novel (untitled)-I'm looking forward to writing this one, but probably won't be for a little bit. 3,000 words.

Cheers,
Natasha

Movie Review: Insanitarium

2011-09-07T21:20:00.000-07:00

Blogger's note: Sorry for the slow updates everyone. Busy month!

Jack’s sister Lily is locked in an insane asylum due to suicidal tendancies. Since she is technically a ward of the state, Jack is not permitted to see her…for reasons which are not adequately explained. Rather than go through the court system, Jack does the more sane option-he strips down, cuts himself, and runs through the streets screaming bloody murder. All so he can talk to his sister. This seems a little unwise.

Weak intro aside, I did genuinely like this film…up to a point. There were patients acting strange (more so than normal, I mean) unexplained experiments from administration, added tension because Jack accidently ticks off a serial killer, and some genuine good scenes with his sister.

So why does this movie fail in the second half? One word: zombies.

Yes. Zombies. Why were the administratiors making zombies? To cure the patients, of course! Yeah, that really makes sense to me.

This movie takes a pivotal turn half-way, to Jack being a helpless fake crazy in a mysterious asylum, to Jack battling zombies. And the movie really suffers because of it.

Final grade: 2.5 out of 5. A fresh change in the horror genre for the first half, boring and predictable in the second.

I can't say what Jack does is completely unbelievable though, considering that people have actually done this in real life.

Book Review: Full Dark, No Stars

2011-08-12T19:01:00.000-07:00

While I was camping last week I had a chance to read up on Stephen’s King Full Dark No Stars, which is a collection of four novellas (five if you’ve got the special edition, which unfortunately I do not). I’ll review each one separately.

1922:

Probably the biggest story out of the four, a farmer named Wilfred decides to murder his wife, his wants to sell the land to his competition. This story takes place in a time when women have little rights, but Wilfred and his son have to deal with the consequences in often surprising ways.

I enjoyed this novella the most out of the four due to the creepy atmosphere and the surprising character twists. My only complaint is that the story ended a little too abruptly for my liking, giving a not-quite satisfying ending.

5/5.

Big Driver:

Oh-boy, the main character is a writer. But before I turn on the usual ‘Stephen King ego’ warning, it is thankfully relevant to the story. On the way back from a conference mystery author Tess takes a bad shortcut home and is raped and left for dead. Rather than go to the police, she decides to take a vigilante approach and unravels a bigger mystery after she discovers that multiple people are involved.

It was harder for me to get emotionally involved in this story when compared to 1922. I’m not squeamish about rape stories, but there was a disconnection for me in this story with the main character-who, to be honest, I found a little boring. Often I found myself skimming the pages to get to the action. There are good parts in this novella, but I couldn’t stay that hooked.

3/5.

Fair Extension:

I really, really wanted to like this story. The first half is actually really good-Dave, a man with terminal cancer meets up with a merchant who offers him a life extension. In return, someone Dave hates (Tom) has to receive a curse. Both characters are pretty interesting during the exchange.

Unfortunately, what follows is a narrative account of how both Dave and Tom’s lives play through over the next year, with Dave getting progressively better and Tom becoming progressively worse. There’s no particular reaction from Dave towards Tom’s misfortune, even when his children are afflicted in horrifying ways. Dave doesn’t make any effort to confess, atone, or do anything to fix this scenario. Eventually the narration ends, and nothing really happens. Disappointing.

1.5/5

A Good Marriage:

Darcy has always been a good wife of twenty years, until she uncovers a secret box in their family basement. She quickly learns that her husband Bob has been leading a horrible double life.

As before I preferred the first half to the second half, particularly with Darcy’s discover and Bob’s confession to her. Stephen King depicts a very real and terrifying scenario that could happen to anyone. While I do understand Darcy’s resolution in the end, I would have preferred to see things fleshed out a little more. Still, it’s a very entertaining read.

4/5.

Overall? A great read with some bone-chilling stories.

Contact Us/Review Policy

2011-08-12T18:53:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone!

If you are interested in a review/interview, please e-mail me at warofthesoulites@gmail.com, and I’ll set up something for you! I am also available on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/natasha.bennett. While I’m not such a great fan of twitter, I do have an account at http://twitter.com/#!/Natasha_Bennett. My website is also at http://www.warofthesoulites.com/.

Review Policy:

I review science fiction, horror, romance, and fantasy of all age levels (including mature). Historical fiction, westerns, and general fiction will get either a pass or a ‘meh’ reaction. I might pick one up if my workload isn’t too heavy, but I honestly believe there are better reviewers out there for those genres.

Now here’s the good news: I accept printed books and e-books, with a preference towards e-books. Unlike many review sites I will also accept self-published books. However, keep in mind that I expect the grammar and spelling to be on par with traditional books. If it isn’t, this will be mentioned in the review. I also do not review unpublished manuscripts.

Finally, keep in mind that I am the only reviewer on this site, so if I’m slow in posting, it is because there is a backlog. After I receive your request I will give you a realistic timeframe of when it will be posted.

Cheers,

Natasha

My Writing

2011-08-09T15:49:00.000-07:00

After working for years as a paranormal investigator, Amy Belkins wants to quit. But her friend, Terry, convinces her to go on one last investigation. Lured by the promise of strange whispers in empty bedrooms, cold spots, and silenced screams, Amy reluctantly agrees to one last hurrah, for old time's sake. However, Amy and Terry are frustrated when their search of the supposedly haunted Lanson house turns up empty.

Later that night, Amy returns alone to retrieve some forgotten equipment and is sucked into a shocking nightmare. The next morning she wakes up five hundred miles away, covered in blood beside an old woman’s dead body. As people continue to die around her, Amy realizes that she is possessed by the spirit of a vengeful child on a mission to right wrongs. On the way, Amy learns a deadly lesson about violence.

As Terry races against time to save her, Amy faces a terrible choice: avenge the child’s murder and save another child's life, or surrender to the police before more people suffer a ghastly fate at the hands of Autumn’s Spirit.

Release date: TBA

More information here

Renolds Osirus spent most of his life as an accountant. To his shock, his life-long dream of becoming a spaceship captain is suddenly granted, and before he can even celebrate, Earth is decimated by a race of mysterious and terrifying aliens. His new ship, the Vigilant, is transported to hostile territory.

Vigilant's first officer, Marcus Collingway, is a terrorist leader and a mass murderer. Long believed dead, he suffers the crew's wrath when he's blamed for the attack on Earth. As Renolds investigates, he exposes a complex web of secrets and lies.

Now trapped on a crippled ship, can the captain and first officer work together to save the Vigilant from the Soulites?

Available to buy here

The new spaceship Vigilant is in bad shape. Although plagued by constant malfunctions and no supplies, the ship's captain, Renolds Osirus, has reason to celebrate. They have located the survivors of the first Vigilant...and have discovered a way to destroy the enemy Soulites.

But to use it, Renolds might have to sacrifice the lives of his crew.

At the same time, the program in Marcus Collingway's mind is breaking down, letting his dark side loose to reveal buried secrets. As his two personalities clash, his answers might lie with Elizabeth Dawson. But his troubled love for her might not survive the changes he's going through -- or what's happening to her.

Available to buy here

Welcome to the new site!

2011-08-08T09:29:00.000-07:00

Hi guys!

As you can see, there have been quite a few changes in my blog. I am building a new site, and of course there are going to be lots of errors and glitches in the process! Please bare with me, as I am about halfway in the process.

That being said, I will still be posting news/reviews on a regular basis.

Cheers,

Natasha

Movie Review: The Cube

2011-07-23T11:51:00.000-07:00

I love Saw for two reasons really-one is the antagonist, and the second is the idea of people trapped together in a maze, forced to work together. The consequences for failure is...well, in Saw's case, not pretty. But we'll talk about why the Saw series broke my heart another day. For now, let's talk about a movie with a similar concept-the Cube.

Six survivors wake up in a room shaped like a cube. Panels on each side lead to an identical room, some of which are filled with traps. The six have no idea how they got there, why they were kidnapped, or how many rooms there are. But if they don't try to escape, they will eventually die from dehydration and starvation.

With a similar and repetitive set design, this movie could have become boring very quickly. Fortunately, the personalities of the captives keep things interesting. Some of the victims could be considered essstential to escape (a cop, a medic, a methameticion, an escape artist) while some of them might not be (a mentally handicapped man, a man who is content to do nothing and die). I could say having these mix of people is contrived, but on the other hand, maybe it is all part of a master plan? Unfortunately we never find out, since the person who created the cube is left a mystery-in this movie, anyway. Randomness also plays a factor. Some characters die right away, others become insane, and the most useless characters suddenly become the most important.

Unfortunately, this movie does suffer a WTF ending, which is pointless and rather silly. Still, could be worse.

Could be Cube 2.

FINAL GRADE: 4 out of 5. An interesting concept which keeps the audience guessing till the end. It suffers slightly from contrived plot threads, however.

Yay a Canadian movie!

Game Review: Dragon's Age 2

2011-07-16T22:09:00.000-07:00

Warning: Box cover for advertisement purposes only. Game may or may not accurately contain Dragons.

For those wondering about the state of my blog, the renovations continue…and so far I have managed to destroy my own header (yay me!). Unfortunately, due to an unforeseen RL move the relaunch of the blog has been pushed back. I have seen some designs I've liked, however, and there will be changes soon. In the meantime, however, please enjoy a review of Dragon's Age 2!

In my usual reviewer tradition, I once again played these games completely out of order. Fortunately this isn't much of an issue. If anything, Dragon's Age 2 reminds me a great deal of Mass Effect 2-you know, the only game I have ever given a perfect score in this blog. Unfortunately, in a lot of ways, this game is not Mass Effect 2.

You play as a character escaping a burning village and who eventually makes their fortune in the city of Kirkwall. I say 'character' because you can play as a female/male mage, warrior, or rogue respectively. And, spoiler warning, you will only see a dragon maybe three times in the game only. Then again, maybe, Generic Fantasy game: the search to end racism didn't have the same ring to it.

Did I mention racism? Why yes, there is a lot of that. The general idea is that a mage will eventually give into the dark side of magic and eventually become a deamon. Consequently, most mages are locked away or given strict guidelines while wandering the land. I have to admit that it's a pretty interesting idea and is executed pretty well.

Unfortunately, there are two things in Dragon's Age 2 which don't work for me, one of them being the companion system. Like Mass Effect 2, you have to work hard to earn the loyalty of your team, but Dragon's Age 2 takes it to a far more extreme level. For example, half of your team is pro-mage, and the other half is anti-mage, so if the player goes on a mission to save a mage, chances are you are going to tick off half your party. This is especially hard in the beginning, when the player won't understand the motivations of their companions to well. Often I would accompany companions on a 'loyalty' mission to resolve some issue, talk to them, and still score negative points without the foggiest notion why. And trust me-even with the best scores some companions will still leave you for a significant portion of the game. Or blow up buildings with innocent people in them (no, seriously). Some players might like companions having a mind of their own, but I dunno, it really bothered me that I couldn't figure out why some members of my party hated me so much (and in some cases, I still have no idea why).

The second is the actual fighting in the game. While I like the fighting/magic system itself in Dragon's Age 2, all of the enemies will respawn at least once, every single fight. Mass Effect 2 did have a lot of fighting, but for the most part it was justified and it did not involve having a second wave coming out of nowhere when the player's back was turned. Combined with an extremely long loading time between levels, it feels like there is a lot of padding to the game.

Overall, though I did enjoy it and would recommend it to someone looking for a good fantasy game.

FINAL GRADE: 3 ½ out of 5. Great graphics, good story and equally good fighting system. Unfortunately the loading time, the extra waves of enemies and the randomness of some companions bring down the grade.

There was one moment in the game where a deamon tried to tempt my companions into betraying me. Naturally, every single one of them happily agreed to carve me into mince meat.

We are moving!

2011-06-29T19:30:00.000-07:00

...sort of, anyway. For the past couple of months I have wanted to give this blog a makeover, and starting potentially this weekend, I intent to change the look of this site. Why? Really for two reasons. One is that while I do like the template, it isn't really functional in some respects. Another is that I don't really have a website that showcases all my writing too well, so the new template will better advertise-er, hightlight it more.

I might also change the name of the blog as well. When I first started, I had no idea what it was going to be, so I choose the most generic title available. You might see some hiccups as well as I switch between templates.

And of course, suggestions are always very welcome on how to improve this blog :)

-Natasha

Game Review: F.E.A.R 3

2011-06-24T20:32:00.000-07:00

The F.E.A.R series holds a special place in my heart. The first game is one of the few that genuinely terrified me in the first levels, and the expansion levels aren’t half-bad either. While F.E.A.R 2 wasn’t as great as the original, I can see the effort put behind it.

So where does this leave F.E.A.R 3? How can I put my feelings into words?

F*$# @$&(@#$&)this@(&($@&(@game$$&@(!&!!!!!!!!

Okay, okay. Let me explain why I feel this way.

F.E.A.R 3 combines the first and second games together. The player continues the story of the main character of the first game, Point Man, as he attempts to escape an evil government facility. Point Man isn’t alone, though, as he is joined by his evil brother ghost Paxton Fettel as he fights his way to Alma, their ghostly yet pregnant mother (yes, this family has a few issues).

I’ll start with the good points first. Paxton Fettel has a really great voice actor, and the character itself is one of the more interesting characters in a horror franchise. Brutally tormented as a child, yet a monster who murders many, he also has a ‘younger brother’ attitude with the main character and I feel like there is lots of room for development. I am glad they brought him back. The idea of Paxton being a playable character can be really fun (as long as there is two players, that is).Even in single player the level can also be replayed as him, and that alone is worth a second play-through.

But here’s where the game quickly falls apart. Certain elements of this game feel really rushed, especially towards the second half. For example, Fettel and Point Man spend a great deal of time searching for Alma. After a lead they had turns out pointless, they suddenly find her without any suitable explanation. To put this in perspective, F.E.A.R 1 has eleven levels. F.E.A.R 3 has eight, and two of them are relatively short.

A second very big problem is the Point Man himself. They strongly hint that there is a ‘good vs evil’ struggle happening with him. Will he side with his family of monsters, or with the government? Well, despite the hints that the player can choose a side, he really can’t, as the choice is taken away in a cutscene. It would probably help if the Point Man could talk, but of course he can’t. Which is a shame, since in the second game Becket was a silent protagonist yet can now talk in F.E.A.R 3. Why can’t the Point Man have an actual personality? This is especially tragic when the Point Man meets Becket for the first time.

I was kind of hoping things would improve at Paxton in the second play through, but nope, from what I saw there is no difference to the story besides the ending (which, with Paxton's character, doesn't make a huge amount of sense). Worst of all, this game ends just when it was really starting to get good.

FINAL GRADE: 2 ½ out of 5. Multiplayer is fun, but a lot is sacrificed in the process. Story-wise, I can think of a couple of ways it could be better. Gameplay wise, the action is fun yet some levels feel too long (which is ironic, considering the game feels too short). Is it scary? Not compared to the first, or even second game. Again, a lot of things are thrown out of the window in favour of a two-player mode I like but didn’t ask for. I will give F.E.A.R 3 some credit though-at least they try something new every game.

I find it amusing that Jin was in the first game, died in the expansion packs, then sprung back to life in the third game because Monolith likes to pretend the expansion packs didn't exist.

Game Review: Duke Nukem Forever

2011-06-20T22:08:00.000-07:00

For those who are not gamers, and living in a cardboard box, Duke Nukem was a pretty famous game even before it hit the stores. Why? Let’s just say there are plenty of jokes about the title: Duke Nukem forever. As in, it took twelve years from start to finish. Even then, the inevitable pretty much happened:

But still, the fans waited patiently. And what did we get? A really, really average game. And yet, about a day after I played this game, the bad reviews started to pour in, and I really can’t understand why. Sure, we seem to be living in a world where we expect to see amazing things, and where the visual graphics and storytelling bar always seem to be raised from year to year. Duke Nukem Forever, on the other hand, seems content to live in an ‘80’s setting, with sub-par graphics and a simple plot and an easy first-person shooter. The reason why I don’t have a problem with this is...well, because it’s Duke Nukem.

Lemme explain for the people who’s never played the original game before. Duke Nukem is considered the ultimate action star, with mere people like Arnold Schwarzenegger happy to lick his boots. Thousands of women love him, men want to be him, and he owns a burger shack, a stripper joint, and a casino all showcasing his awesomeness. He’s saved the world a dozen times over, and easily performs insane stunts that defy physics or common sense. Oh, and in his spare time he punches out Christian Bale. And protects the world from aliens.

In case it wasn’t obvious, Duke Nukem is considered a parody of an action star, and the game itself never takes itself too seriously. I’ve heard complaints that the game is too short, but I dunno, if anything, the levels seem a tad too long if anything. Really my only gripe is that the original voice actor is in the game, and while he does have a kick-ass voice, he can’t seem to have too much emotional gauge. (Good thing he’s Duke Nukem, and too cool for those girlie emotional scenes!). Still, in the rare time he does have it the voice really feels misplaced.

Oh, and I suppose there’s a complaint or two about Duke Nukem killing all those woman on the spaceship. Well, two things. First of all, the exact same thing happened in the original so one could argue that the game is being true to the source material. Second, he’s Duke Nukem so...it was their fault they got in the way of his bullets. Yeah.

FINAL GRADE: 2 ½ out of 5. You’re not going to get a ‘Heavy Rain’ type of game here. More like lots of toilet humor, lots of naked women, and lots of the Duke.

I did love the loading screen, which gives you such helpful tips like 'Avoid bullets to take less damage.' or 'If you get stuck, remember to cheat online.'

Webseries Review: Mortal Kombat Legacy: Part three

2011-06-19T16:51:00.000-07:00

Blogger's note: Sorry for the slow updates everyone. More will be coming. Also, moderate spoilers for Mortal Kombat Legacy.

Episode 6: Raiden

This episode starts off a bit differently with a note from the writer, Kevin Tancharden, announcing that the episode provides a very different take from the Legacy series and he hopes the viewers will enjoy it. Hm, almost sounds like an apology.

Don’t apologize for being creative, Kevin. Apologize for the first five episodes.

Anyway, this episode starts off with Raiden arriving...somehow in a metal institution (I’m guessing magical comet, but whatever). And talk about all the places he could have landed in! To make matters worse, Raiden is dressed in exactly the same garb as all the rest of the patients. Suffice to say, they don't really believe that Raiden is a thunder god and Earthrealm can't survive without his help in the tournament.

And you know what? Raiden’s right. It would be a good idea to have a God on your side. This very same God who can’t seem to escape a mental ward despite being able to throw lightning bolts and has teleportation powers.

Okay, I’ll play nice. Maybe getting beaten up, the sedatives, and the lobotomies are wrecking havoc with Raiden’s powers (yes, he gets multiple lobotomies. Very disturbing lobotomies). Although one would think they would try electro-shock therapy first rather than going all the way up to hammering needles in the brain. But whatever.

Overall, I like this episode for what it attempts to do, but unfortunately since episodes 1-5 are too similar to the overall Mortal Kombat plot this kind of clashes. Either portray them all in a gritty real world like Rebirth, or have them in fantasy worlds like Legacy. Half and half just doesn’t work. (yes, I know I’m impossible to please).

Episode 7 + 8, Scorpion and Sub-Zero.

Call me insane, but the characters of Scorpion and Sub-zero never really appealed to me. I can see how they would appeal to people, but over the years I think they’ve been...eh, overhyped. Still, that’s just my opinion.

Anyway, both these episodes explore the backstory of Scorpion. If anyone has played any game of mortal kombat, they would know that Scorpion’s family was tragically murdered at the hands of Sub-Zero’s clan. The episode doesn’t stray too far from the story as well. While preparing for the Shogun’s arrival, Scorpion is called away from his family to an ambush. Unfortunately, a great deal of episode 7 is establishing how cute Scorpion’s family actually is, and how tragic it will be when they die (complete with Scorpion saying, ‘I’ll be back by morning’ no less).

But enough about that. Let’s talk about the truly tragic characters in this series-Scorpion and Sub-zero. Let’s reflect on how average their costumes are, and how uncool they are when compared to the Rebirth trailer. In Rebirth, Scorpion was a true assassin, dark and hidden, and I actually believed his weapon was something cool and not an arrowhead attached to the string. Sub-zero looked more like an actual monster than a person, and both were something I was genuinely looking forward to watching. Watching these clowns dressed in those costumes...it’s the biggest disappointment so far, to say the least. They're not bad versions, but I have seen so much better.

But I will give these episodes some credit-there are some great scenes towards the end of episode eight, and a twist I didn’t see as well. I would recommend checking it out just for that.

Mortal Kombat: Legacy Review: Part two

2011-06-02T20:25:00.000-07:00

Blogger's note: Minor spoilers for Mortal Kombat Legacy.

So here I am, reviewing Mortal Kombat Legacy again. Let's see if my opinion will drastically change from part one.

Episode 3-Johnny Cage

Nope, my opinion hasn't changed.

Like the first two episodes, this episode has decent acting, and decent fighting. And again, my problems with this episode are similar with the first two episodes-we really don’t see anything new. Johnny Cage is a failing action movie star, but comes up with a new script idea to revive his career. Suffice to say, his producers screw him and Johnny takes action. I personally like Johnny Cage out of most of the Mortal Kombat fighters, and I can see the creators doing their best in this episodes, but alas Johnny's character in general doesn’t have a great deal of depth in the beginning, and neither does this episode. We also miss out on Johnny’s typical funny one-liners from the game and the movie. That being said, Johnny does have some genuine emotions in this one too, which is nice to see.

This episode does raise one question I have, and this is also a problem in the movie: Why exactly is Shang Tsung of all people recruiting Johnny Cage? I can believe that Shang Tsung might do this because he might think Johnny is easily beatable, but why does he get to select Earth’s fighters? Isn’t this breaking some Elder God’s rules? We don’t see Raider travelling to Outworld to select Milenna or Baraka to fight, so why here? And if Shang Tsung is allowed to do that, why bother picking people who are half-way decent fighters at all? Why not pick up ten people off the street?

Oh, and this episode confirms that Mortal Kombat Rebirth as non-cannon, as it brings up plenty of plot-holes otherwise.

Episode 4 + 5-Kitana/Mileena

This two-parter is so far the best in the series, but it’s still not going to rate high on my overall opinion. We do get to see a lot of background with Kitana/Mileena, but half of that is live acting, and the other half with animation. Unfortunately I’m not really a huge fan of any movie or series doing this, because doing so usually screams to me ‘we don’t have a budget or we're too lazy to film a sequence so here’s a drawing!’ But this is really just a personal opinion and it probably works well for other people. That being said, I didn’t hate the animation itself, and I’ve certainly seen far worse in high-budget movies.

Here is the plot in a nutshell: Outworld is taken over by Shao Kahn, who proclaims himself King and takes Sindel as his wife and Kitana as his daughter. The former King flees and...does nothing I guess for about twenty years. Fearing that Kitana might learn the truth about him, Shao Kahn orders Shang Tseung to create Milenna, a clone of Kitana with lots of pointy teeth.

I really enjoyed the live action sequences, however, especially the fight chorography between the two sisters (although I have a minor gripe that in some sequences I can't tell which one is which due to their clothing being too similar). Also, points for introducing them early as children rather as adults-I really do prefer that shift from the actual game.

But-sigh-again nothing new. No, I won't stop going on about this. Rebirth promised something original. I don't care if this is a marketing ploy or not. When are we going to see something original? I’m sick of your stalling, Legacy. Show me something which is going to totally impress me or I’ll-

HOLY CRAP LORD RAIDEN’S IN A MENTAL HOSPTIAL!

Webseries Review: The Machine of Death

2011-05-29T17:30:00.000-07:00

Blogger's note: Sincerest apologies to Orpheos Productions for missing their initial review request. It's a good reminder to check my spam box more often! Also, minor spoilers for the webseries.

When it comes to reviewing anything visual, I tend to do so in two different ways. One is the ‘Hollywood’ way, which is judging a film with movies with Brad Pitt and thousands of dollars behind it. The second is for films that might not have that kind of financial backing or A-list stars available. This is especially true for production companies just starting up or something a fan created. And both review methods boil down to two questions: Can this entertain me and would I recommend it?

Orpheos Productions is a new production company, and recently released a series titled ‘The Machine of Death’, currently in three parts with more to follow. None of these parts are numbered on youtube, but they are all stand-alone so it doesn't matter. The basic premise is this: The world has created some kind of machine which will tell a person how they die, but not when. The three parts explore three different people’s reactions behind this, some ending up with good results and others with not. This sort of puts me in the mind of Minority Report, where one human received a predetermined destiny and did everything he could to prove the system wrong. I'm just saying, if I got a prediction of being burned to death (for example), I would immediately take up skydiving and try to land in a nest full of hungry crocodiles. The machine said I was pretty much immortal to anything else, right?

Anyway, this kind of scenario does raise all sorts of interesting questions, some of which the Machine of Death series does tackle. Fair warning though-most of these episodes do consist of one actor or actress explaining what happened in front of the camera. However, so far all the actors do between a decent-to-great job and your eyes shouldn’t stray from the screen too much.

In short, would I recommend this? Yes. Does it entertain? Yes. Go check it out.

Episode 1 - The Perfect Place: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lK2auzqYw4Y

Machine of Death homepage: http://orpheos.co.uk/machineofdeath/

Game Review: L.A Noire

2011-05-26T20:28:00.000-07:00

Blogger's note: minor spoilers for the game.

L.A Noire is one of the few games that I was genuinely excited about, enough to pre-order and get on opening day. I have a certain fondness for 1920’s style gameplay, and with Rockstar behind it this game has to be awesome, right?

Well, despite my enthusiasm L.A Noire tried very hard to make sure I didn’t like it, at least for the first half. Ex-war hero Cole Phelps joins the LAPD and moves fast up the ranks with a perfect moral compass. And, as we all know perfect characters are boring characters. I wouldn’t call this game actually boring, (not at all), but the word ‘tedious’ springs to mind rather quickly. Each murder involves a similar formula 1) Investigate the scene for clues 2) interrogate a suspect 3) go into a thrilling chase scene or firefight. For me personally the most annoying part is the homicide division. If these cases were different things might be interesting. Instead a serial killer is on the loose, and repeats the same crime no less than five times, and it gets repetitive fast. Fortunately this can be broken up by ‘street crimes’ which are very short crimes, but I do seriously recommend your partner drives you to, as it can take forever to drive from one area of the city to another.

Luckily Cole is not perfect, and without giving too much away makes an illegal choice half-way. Unfortunately, this kind of bugs me, because we aren’t given too many cutscenes to establish Cole’s reasoning behind this (unless I accidently skipped a whole bunch), or any character development afterwards. Instead, we pretty much give up on Cole and focus on another character, Jack, for the last quarter of the game. Thankfully the crimes are also different as the game progresses.

Gameplay-wise, I would advise against having the mentality of Grand Theft Auto for this game. In other words, you try to run over every single thing in the game, it will: A) affect your final score in the case and B) will be really annoying because your partner will scream at you every few seconds for doing so.

The biggest selling point of L.A Noire is the facial graphics during interrogations, and it’s up to the player to tell if a person is telling the truth or lying. Which, believe it or not, is far harder than it seems. This is mostly due to the fact that there are three options: A) Truth B) Doubt C) Lie. And sometimes doubt and lie can be really difficult to tell apart. Still, I did find it enjoyable, but I seriously doubt anyone will get it right the first time around.

Overall there isn’t much to do in the city itself, but there is a detailed environment to explore. And the voice acting is actually perfect for every character. I’ve heard complaints that the ending well, frankly sucks. I wasn’t bothered by it, although for the life of me I have no idea why the damsel in distress was kidnapped when she was.

FINAL GRADE: 3 ½ out of 5. I like L.A Noire, and there are other reviewers out there who do rave about it. However, I think L.A Noire has the potential to be better and more exciting. There is talk of a sequel, so this is a good enough starting off point. The casual player might find it fun but repetitive at times.

Am I the only one who had to get a dictionary to figure out what 'Noire' meant?

Let's be serious for a moment...

2011-05-21T19:16:00.000-07:00

Hi guys,

First of all, the good news I mentioned earlier is one of my novellas, 'The Red Zone', has been accepted and is currently in a contest. It's a free read for anyone who is interested in a good zombie apocalypse story.

http://www.talesofworldwarz.com/stories/2011/05/13/the-red-zone-by-natasha-bennett/

And (ahem) speaking of the Apocalypse....

By now most people know that some fanatical Christian predicted that the world would end today at 6 p.m, and of course that didn't happen. Naturally I made a whole bunch of smart remarks on facebook about it, and it does amuse me, but to me it's also just sad. It's sad that a whole bunch of people donated their life savings to this guy so their souls would be saved, and of course nothing actually happened so now they have nothing. Just to be clear, the majority of the world didn't actually do this and are way smarter than that. I'm not judging this even as a 'Christian' thing, since most Christian people I know are normal. I judge this as a select few who are too afraid of death, and what happens thereafter.

Religiously I'm a Wiccan, so I don't have to deal with this whole doomsday concept, or even a heaven/hell concept. For those that are interested, here is what I believe: We could die at any day, any moment, from any number of factors-a passing comet, a flood, or even something mundane like getting run over by a bus. I don't need a doomsday clock on top of everything else. Is this a depressing mentality? Honestly not, because I can view each day of living as a wonderful gift, and I try not to waste it. I don't need to give all my money to some crazy guy for something better after I die. I could give some more thoughts about what I really think will happen after we die, but that kind of opens a huge debate and that's not what this blog post is about.

This is the point of my blog: Nobody should pay attention to a doomsday clock. Ever. We have enough to worry about.

Although just for the record, if the Apocalypse does happen, I will survive it. Why? Because I have a zombie plan.

Agree? Disagree? Should I be holding a doomsday sign outside? Feel free to comment!

Cover and synopsis for Autumn's Spirit!

2011-05-13T18:56:00.000-07:00

Hi guys,

Check out my cover for Autumn's Spirit! Isn't it pretty??

Official write up:

After working for years as a paranormal investigator, Amy Belkins wants to quit. But her friend, Terry, convinces her to go on one last investigation. Lured by the promise of strange whispers in empty bedrooms, cold spots, and silenced screams, Amy reluctantly agrees to one last hurrah, for old time's sake. However, Amy and Terry are frustrated when their search of the supposedly haunted Lanson house turns up empty.

Later that night, Amy returns alone to retrieve some forgotten equipment and is sucked into a shocking nightmare. The next morning she wakes up five hundred miles away, covered in blood beside an old woman’s dead body. As people continue to die around her, Amy realizes that she is possessed by the spirit of a vengeful child on a mission to right wrongs. On the way, Amy learns a deadly lesson about violence.

As Terry races against time to save her, Amy faces a terrible choice: avenge the child’s murder and save another child's life, or surrender to the police before more people suffer a ghastly fate at the hands of Autumn’s Spirit.

More details will be available at Lillibridge Press: http://www.lillibridgepress.com/book/Autumn_s_Spirit

I also have more good news, which will be posted later (hint-check out the new/upcoming projects box to the right).

Game Review: Portal 2

2011-05-08T08:42:00.000-07:00

Blogger's note: Minor spoilers for the game.

Following the events of Portal 1, Chell ends up in stasis again, until she is awoken by Wheatley, a robot in charge of the other thousands of human test subjects trapped in stasis. Unfortunately, since Wheatley is an idiot, he manages to kill all of the other test subjects and, while helping Chell to escape, also awakens GLADOS, the main antagonist from the last game.

This game is much larger than the first game, since the original was a tacked-on expansion pack. So does bigger equal better? Eh, yes and no. Much of this review (and the player’s enjoyment) will depend on what the gamer is looking for. If the gamer is going into Portal 2 looking for a first-person shooter, they are going to be unpleasantly surprised. If they are going into this looking for challenging puzzles...they might be a little disappointed as well, since the casual gamer can pretty much solve almost every single puzzle without having to run to the nearest on-line walkthrough (yes, you know who you are!).That being said, there are a couple of new elements to make the tests more interesting, such as glowing bridges and vortex tunnels.

Even the storyline is pretty subjective. While the dialogue is fresh and humorous, much of it depends on the player itself. For example, Wheatley has some great lines, but he may be annoying to some people since he never stops talking for a nanosecond. GLADOS might appeal to the long-time fan, but her quest to discover who Caroline is might serve as an annoying distraction from her usual nail-biting sarcasm. Even new addition Cave Johnson might serve as another distraction from the puzzles themselves.

So who does it appeal to? Definitely the casual gamer, one who isn’t looking for perfection and able to let a few things slide. I personally found the puzzles fun, both in single player and multiplayer. The story is strong and the dialogue is original and made me burst out laughing several times. What I didn’t like about Portal 2, however, was the level design, especially in open areas. Most of it feels repetitive and kind of bland. There also a tone of hopelessness which I couldn’t help but experience. Ultimately, all of the characters are doing this to progress science...but why? Everyone has long since abandoned Aperture Science. Even if Glados manages to invent a device to change the world, no one is going to be there to pick it up.

However, there is an intentional note of sadness, especially towards the end. This came with very strong storytelling and characters we can enjoy. So overall did I like the game? Yes. Is it a game everyone will like? Maybe not, particularly the hard-core fans who were expecting something more amazing than Portal 1. The problem was, Portal 1 only became amazing because no one saw it coming, and we were eagerly awaiting the sequel for some time.

FINAL GRADE: 3 ½ out of 5. A little repetitive, but strong voice actors, strong storytelling, and mostly decent puzzles.

So one group test gets to fight an army of half-men, half-mantis, and I get stuck firing portals into walls?

Writing News-Interview time!

2011-05-08T08:31:00.000-07:00

Hi guys,

For anyone who's interested, I now have an interview up at BookWenches. I always hate it during interviews when I have to answer the same questions over and over again, so I'm really happy to say that this one is different and a lot of fun to do!

http://www.bookwenches.com/iviewnatashabennett.htm

I also have another one coming up next Tuesday! Will post up the link when I get it.

Review of Mortal Kombat 9: The Game-Part 1.

2011-04-28T20:13:00.000-07:00

Blogger's note: Minor Spoilers for the game.

So, last week I did a review of Mortal Kombat 9: the Demo.For those that missed it, here's a recap-I typed something up:

This was more or less the general reaction:

And then I ran back home and planned a crappy tour show.

Oh wait no that wasn't me.

In all seriousness, a lot of your arguments in your comments were valid (no, not the sexist one), but I think what a lot of people might be forgetting was that I wasn’t judging Mortal Kombat the entire game. I was only judging the demo, and when it came down to it, I thought the demo was pretty weak. I also didn’t read up on a lot of what the game had beforehand. I did this on purpose so I wouldn’t be spoiled by the plot or have my own opinion influenced by other reviewers

So here’s my opinion on the entire game. While some of my previous arguments are invalid, some of them are not. This is a pretty long review, so it shall be two parts. I am also going to be breaking the game down by it’s features, since there is a lot going on this game.

Story Mode: One thing I really liked (and didn’t expect) was the fact they carried over the plot from Armageddon, with evil Raiden fighting Shao Kahn. He eventually gets defeated and sends a simple message to his past self, ‘He must win’. Raiden, being the ultimate cliché time-traveler, promptly tries to change the future, screws it up more, and even has the classic ‘Noooo it wasn’t supposed to be this way!’ line.

That being said, the story actually shows us quite a few things which expand the characters, which is something I’ve been asking for since the beginning. We see the human versions of Cyrax and Sektor, and Kabal before he became…um, ‘shish-Kabaled’ (bad joke).

With Raiden altering the timeline, there are also some genuine WTF moments, particularly from Liu Kang. For me that’s actually the best part. Lui Kang wasn’t really that much developed as a character besides wanting to bed Princess Kitana and being Raiden’s devoted follower, so it’s a little interesting to see him take a stand when things get a little crazy.

My only gripe with the story is pretty small-there were some scenes where the main characters should have logically lost and the story should have progressed that way. Not to spoil much, but there was one fight with Nightwolf where he beat Sindel, and in the very next cutscene he is getting his ass handed to him by her. I think there was some room to show us what would happen if a player lost a match (maybe have a cutscene with the world being destroyed or whatever) but it’s a very small gripe.

Overall, the story is pretty awesome 5/5.

Controls: Eh, I know I haven’t commented much on it before, but I do find the controls kind of average. People have said that they are responsive-which is true, they are way more responsive than the early Mortal Kombat games, but I've played other games with far more interesting combat systems, which is why I'm not giving extra points for this.

However, for those that are interested, I’ve mastered the combat moves, the combos, and the fatalities very easily, but I really had the same strategy for winning every single fight (which includes Shao Kahn)-jump up in the air, kick them in the face, then uppercut when I land. Add a little variation if the enemy AI starts to block, then repeat. (Come to think of it, I’ve won every single Mortal Kombat game that way). The fighting became somewhat intense during the more difficult matches, but most of the time it just got repetitive. Although I can easily blame the enemy AI for that and not the combat system. Finally, there were moments in the game where I was trying to throw ordinary punches, and somehow ended up doing special moves (usually ones that didn't help me at all). 4/5.

On-line Mode: Thanks a million, Sony. 0/0

Stay tuned for the challenge tower, all the extra features, merchandising, and yes, the x-ray system I love so much.

Webseries Review: Mortal Kombat Legacy

2011-04-25T18:17:00.000-07:00

Since it’s still going to be a little while before I review Mortal Kombat 9 (it’s coming, don’t worry!) let's talk about something else Mortal Kombat-related. In the demo itself I praised Mortal Kombat Rebirth, which was essentially a fan trailer. I love this trailer, and so did a lot of other people. It portrayed a very realistic portrayal of Mortal Kombat, new and original ideas behind some characters, it had great fighting chorography, great music, great visuals, and Jeri Ryan. It came out of nowhere and blew me away.

It probably shouldn’t be a surprise that this trailer soon developed into a ten-episode webseries, retitled Mortal Kombat Legacy. If you haven’t watched it on Youtube yet, I strongly recommend doing so and then reading the review. There will be spoilers!

I know I’m probably going to get even more heat for saying this (it's probably because I’m a girl or something :)) but the actual webseries…is pretty good, but not spectacular. Don’t get me wrong-Mortal Kombat Legacy is good, but so far it is not the same quality as the trailer itself.

The first two episodes basically revolve around Jax and Sonya who are trapped by Kano as they try to ambush him in an arms factory. And…yeah, that’s pretty much it. There are a lot of positives in this web series-they did get the original actors from the trailer back in the web series, such as Jeri Ryan. They also got Tahmoh Penikett (Helo from Battlestar Galactica) to cameo as Stryker. I also do like the guy cast as Kano as well.There are some decent action scenes (well mostly-I don't approve of how Kano kidnaps Sonya off-camera) and the music and visuals are still pretty good.

So why does this fail? Well, as I said this web series is good, but it’s not as fantastic as I was hoping it could be. We don’t learn anything new about the characters-Sonya is after Kano because he killed her partner (probably only two days from retirement). Jax is protective of Sonya, and Kano is an arms dealer. Three basic characters from Mortal Kombat are established, with a history we already know.

This would be fine if this was a longer web series and we had a lot of time to develop them-but we’re one fifth of the way done. I’ve also seen a new trailer for Mortal Kombat Legacy which kind of doesn’t help my opinion that this will show us anything new. And before people ask me why I'm making such a big deal out of this, bare this in mind-Rebirth seemed to go out of its way to establish new backgrounds for the characters to make them more real-Baraka was a demented doctor who put blades in his arms, and Reptile had a weird genetic condition. Both of them apparently lived on Earth. And yet Legacy does a complete turnaround by stating that these people are from different worlds again.

Let me put it another way. This is Sub-Zero from the Rebirth Trailer:

And this is Sub-Zero from the Legacy Trailer:

Guess which one I want to see more? :) Also, I couldn't help but notice that the gore is somewhat reduced in the webseries. Probably because Warner Brothers got involved.

As I said, it's still early in the series. This is good entertainment, and will probably end up being something a lot better than the movies (well the second one anyway) and I applaud the fact that someone, somewhere can make a decent Mortal Kombat film. I really hope this can succeed.

Or at least have a lot of Johnny Cage in it. :)

And now a word from your sponser.....

2011-04-17T19:40:00.000-07:00

Hi guys,

I'm sure everyone's been noticing the slow updates. A couple of reasons for this, mostly because my laptop monitor finally kicked the bucket and I had to send the whole thing to repair shop. Sometimes I'm super-cheap so it kind of bites having to cough up three hundred bucks to fix it.

That being said, I d have some great news. You might have noticed that I am now updating my current projects (that's the small box to your right...if you would care to move your eyes very slightly over there). One of them being is that one of my ghost novellas, Autumn's Spirit, has been accepted by a new publisher and will be sold as an e-book (or e-novella, however you want to call that). However, I have seen some of the early cover work so far and it's gorgeous! I'll post more news as I get it.

One of my other projects is War of the Soulites 3, of course, which is nearing the final stages and will be sent to Lyrical Press shortly. I am really sorry for the delay on this, and I hope people are still interested in seeing the epic conclusion! Trust me, it's epic!

That's all for now. I'll also be posting more reviews shortly. I have preordered Mortal Kombat 9 and I look forward to playing and reviewing it (I know, I choose it over Portal 2...what was I thinking?)

-Natasha

Game Review: Silent Hill Homecoming

2011-04-09T12:40:00.000-07:00

I’ve heard a lot of bad reviews with Silent Hill Homecoming, but I really like this game. Call me a graphical snob, but I find it far more scary to fight things that look like monsters when, compared to say, Silent Hill 1, when I fought a bunch of eight-bit pixels.

Fighting is the key word in this review, and this is a big aspect of the game that most critics and I will disagree with. Unlike other Silent Hill games, you can actually fight in this one-and win. I like the new combat system. Most critics don’t, their reasons being that Silent HIll is a horrible town filled with monsters, and to have a fighting chance diminishes that fear. It is far more atmospheric to run from the monsters than to actually fight them off.

Well, unfortunately I like to actually be able to play the game. I like to survey my surroundings. I don’t like running from room to room without having a chance to explore it, and having to respawn every ten seconds because a swipe from one monster took three quarters of my life bar. That’s not terrifying. That gets really annoying very fast (and also coincidently why I have not reviewed Silent Hill 3 yet).

Anyway, this game takes place in Shephard’s Glen (yes, not Silent Hill again, but there’s actually a legitimate reason this time). You play as Alex Shepard-

Okay, seriously, how many games need to have a main protagonist with the name ‘Alex’? I can think of six now off the top of my head:

Alex Munro-Star Trek Voyager and Star Trek Elite Force

Alex Mercer-Prototype

Alex Mason-Call of Duty: Black Ops

Alec Mason-Red Faction Guerilla

Alyx Vance-Half Life 2.

Alex Shephard: Silent Hill Homecoming

Anyway, Alex is a returning soldier, and is looking for his missing brother, Joshua. And here is where Silent Hill Homecoming fails the most: the plot. Joshua is seen plenty of times in the game, and he either runs away from Alex or watches him die and doesn’t help him. This only makes sense in the context of the ending, which doesn’t make any sense in the actual game (I won’t spoil it, but think Silent Hill 2). Which is really a shame, because all the characters are actually pretty good with mysterious intentions. When those intentions are revealed, however, the characters make no sense and become meaningless.

So why do I like Silent Hill Homecoming more than other games in the series? Well, despite being able to fight there are some scenes in this game which are really atmospheric. The game difficulty is a little uneven-really difficult in the beginning and really easy towards the end (seriously, I beat the final boss in one try without taking any damage at all), but I like the voice acting, the characters, and some of the ideas Silent Hill was trying to convey.

FINAL GRADE: 3 out of 5. I really like this game, but there are things I just hate about the Silent Hill series which rears it’s ugly head before too long, such as the constant misdirection and the repetitive levels. How many times in this series do I have to see a foggy town without anything happening?

Sorry for the lack of updates everyone, but I should have exciting news soon!

Demo Review: Mortal Kombat 9

2011-03-24T21:42:00.000-07:00

I played the demo for Mortal Kombat 9, and I was really not hyped up to play the game. There are several reasons for this, one of which isn’t the game’s fault. Most people have seen the Mortal Kombat Rebirth trailer by now, which really does portray the Mortal Kombat series as a movie, in a very serious light. Compared to that the new game is very silly by comparism.

Don’t get me wrong-Mortal Kombat has always been silly throughout the years, but lately it is getting even more ridiculous, and it was really noticable in Armageddon (too many people fighting at once will destroy the world-seriously?) but I’m sure the storyline in this game will be very gritty and realistic *cough Raiden goes travelling back in time cough revisting the first tournament has already been done before cough cough*.

Still, part of me really likes Mortal Kombat. If I was a game designer, I could see so much potential for the games and the characters. In Mortal Kombat 3, for example, Earth had been taken over by Shao Kahn and most of human population had lost thier souls-now that would be a great story to expand upon. However whatever development gained from the characters is usually lost or reset by the next game. Lui Kang was a zombie, now he's not. Raiden was evil, now he's not. Johnny Cage dies and comes back to life so many times it might as well be his signature move.

So we’re going back in time for this one, and back to basics. Is it any better?

The good: Of course the game has a graphical upgrade and the fighting style is grittier and gorier. But at the same time, I feel like they are trying to overcompensate for something. Maybe they are running out of ideas?

The mediocre: They switched from a 3-D environment back to a 2-D background, but in all honesty, it doesn’t seem to have much impact on me either way. The 2-D environment is long enough that the players won’t feel too enclosed.

The bad:

Oh boy, where do I start?

First of all, Johnny and Milenna are my two favourite characters in mortal kombat. At first I loved how in the opening fight they have a cheesy line they give to their opponent. However, when they have the same cheesy line every single match, it starts to grate against the nerves. And worse, when you fight a clone of yourself...yeah, it gets annoying really fast.

And speaking of Milenna, I swear they are trying to remove as many articles of clothing from her as possible. I’m all for making her character sexy, but when I get distracted in the fight because I am watching certain body parts um...jiggle, it starts to cross a line.

One of the new features of mortal kombat is the internal damage you are able to inflict upon the player. Interesting in concept, laughable in execution. I mean, if someone stomps on your chest and literally breaks all of your ribs, are you really going to stand up and win the match?

You can inflict this move by a ‘special move’ meter, which requires you to...uh, do absolutely nothing. I’m serious, this fills up when you do special moves and combos, but it doesn’t seem to like basic punches or anything else. Honestly, I think this meter has a mind of its own. I simply waited out the match without doing any moves at all, getting my character literally beaten to death, and the special-move meter filled up twice.

I obviously have a lot of bad points for this demo, but I did read they are emphasizing story more so than actual gameplay. Will it be worth it? Hopefully. I would make a joke about Raiden going out into space next time, but they actually already did that in the last game.

And when are they going to bring back the best part of Mortal Kombat-the friendships?

Game Review: Mass Effect 2

2011-03-13T15:52:00.000-07:00

I've never played Mass Effect 1, mostly because I don't have an XBOX 360 and asking me to inport a character from that console to my PS3 is a little bit silly. Luckily this is a very minor issue and doesn't cause too much confusion in the plot.

The player stars as Commander Sheperd, who dies shortly after an alien attack. Fortunately he is resurrected by Cerebrus, who want him to investigate a string of missing colonies. Unfortunately, Cerebrus is also an alien-hating human-supremesist group.

And this is why Mass Effect 2 works on so many levels-almost every mission involves a serious moral choice. While some are clear-cut on what is the right choice, others are not. To make it more fun, all the choices made in Mass Effect will be saved and change the upcoming events Mass Effect 3. All of this is directly influenced, of course, by whether or not the player wants Commander Sheppard to be good or evil.

Not to imply that Sheppard spends most of his time bogged down with serious moral problems-he can also spend his time getting drunk in bars, getting discounts in stores by creating commercials, and has some truly funny and entertaining moments (especially when he’s evil).

Gameplay-wise, Mass Effect 2 consistently divides its time between first-person shooter and storytelling mode. I would say that that the constant pointing and shooting can be repetitive, but not overly so-fortunately there are enough cinematic cuts to not have it become mindless. There is also an upgrade system which is relatively quick and painless.

My one and really only gripe about the game is the loading time, especially while on the main spaceship. Still, it’s a big game, so that's not really surprising.

FINAL GRADE: 5 stars out of 5. Impressive storytelling and creative missions. And it’s got Martin Sheen. Here’s hoping the third game will be just as awesome!

Not crazy about the Mass Effect 3 trailer though.....

Game Review: Dead Space Severed

2011-03-01T20:50:00.000-08:00

Blogger's note: Spoilers for Dead Space Extraction. Also no images (sorry). The game only came out a couple of hours ago.

The Dead Space series is really good at doing one of two things-either making a really good product, or making a really bad one.

Dead Space Severed is the more-or-less sequel to Dead Space Extraction. You know, that game I really loved and raved about. In this game you play as Gabriel Walker (I guess the main character in Dead Space Extraction, Nathan, really did turn into a monster in the end) who is trying to get his now-pregnant wife Lexine out of the sprawl. Lexine for the most part does what she normally does, which is stand around looking horrified.

This game is a failure in so many ways. First of all, it’s relatively short (a whole grand two levels) and annoyingly enough most of those two levels are a straight copy and paste from Dead Space 2. And since my character was somehow imported from Dead Space 2 I am also ridiculously overpowered against enemies-and no, I don’t think there’s any way you can create a new character. Is it scary? Hell no. What’s kept the Dead Space series somewhat decent is the madness factor for the main characters. A madness factor which is unfortunately absent. So with that taking a holiday, I only have swarms of monsters to keep me occupied, and since I was overpowered, I started to feel a little sorry for them. Especially the baby monsters.

I can’t get over how lazy this game is. The intro to Dead Space 2 was one of the best intros for a game I had ever seen. Isaac Clarke wakes up in a straight jacket, in an insane asylum just as a monster is about to eat him. Dead Space Severed starts with Gabe telling Lexine, ‘Um, the monsters are here again. Guess we better hide or something.’

I spent the whole time thinking about many ways this game could have been improved. First of all, they could have brought back Nathan and introduced him in the madness segments. Okay, so the studio was too cheap to get the voice actor back. How about just having him stand around in the background looking menacing? Or how about Isaac Clarke? The guy’s finally gotten a little bit of personality and at least it would have been a fan service. The only thing noteworthy was the ending to this game, which only served to tick me off.

Final Grade: 0 stars out of 5. I want my money back, and I want to forget this game ever existed.

Then again, it was only seven bucks so I guess it's not the end of the world....

Author's Blog Monk: Michal Wojcik

2011-02-26T17:41:00.000-08:00

Canadian Fantasy
by Michal Wojcik

I have become my own worst enemy.

Some of you might remember a video I did a while back with Sarah Murray and Natasha Bennett where I discussed, briefly, the idea of “Canadian Speculative Fiction.” Ms. Murray took a look at how Canadian symbols became focal points for texts rather than the story itself, to the detriment of said stories, then I rambled and dithered into a conclusion that the strength of Canadian SF was our lack of tradition and out ability to keep things fresh and unfettered.

I was wrong, to a certain extent.

I’ve recently begun work on a novel and found, to my horror, that my setting and themes were starting to morph into the “northern experience” as told by Margaret Atwood, Northrop Fry, and John Clute. Reading through Out of this World: Canadian Science Fiction & Fantasy Literature, while frustrating at times, did shed a great deal of light on the subject. All this time I thought I was writing on the periphery, from the immigrant experience, and soon found my descriptions of the northern woodlands where the story begins were considerably influenced by Susanna Moodie’s Roughing it in the Bush (1852), and that my main inspiration for landscapes came from 17th century explorer’s accounts of Canada. It comes, I think, from my own tenuous connection to these things: growing up in the Yukon where the forest and the mountains still hem us in our settlements, where a ten minute walk from home can still get you lost in the endless blanket of trees.

The northern experience of the “gothic” forest, struggle against the elements, isolation both physical and social, quiet introspection, these are all the supposed marks of Canadian fiction. I’m starting to recognize them in my current work. And, in retrospect, it’s in my past short fiction as well, if somewhat less pronounced. The actual “Canadian-ness” of this narrative, of course, is a very particular occurrence, yet when Robert Runt and Christine Kulyk write, “Canadian SF tends towards introspective character studies rather than action-adventure,” I can look back at a good number of my short stories and nod. Yes, maybe they have a point, though blood & thunder & high adventure certainly have their place (a series of steampunk short stories I’m working on, for instance, thrive on cussing and wanton destruction).

I have to wonder about this, and about Canadian fantasy in general. What kind of fantasy stories has a “northern sensibility” produced? Guy Gavriel Kay certainly tempers his historio-fantasy adventures with a great deal of introspection, and the haunting wilderness appears in Sailing to Sarantium. Unfortunately, I haven’t read enough Canadian fantasy to really pick up the thread. I’m sure it must exist somewhere, giving our work its own unique identity that I never really believed existed. Until now.

“The Northern Cosmos: Distinctive Themes in Canadian SF” in Out of this World: Canadian Science Fiction & Fantasy Literature (Kingston: Quarry Press, 1995), 47.

Michal Wojcik is a fantasy writer currently living in the Yukon. You can find out more about his work at One Last Sketch.

Author's Blog Month: Sara-Jayne Townsend

2011-02-20T12:35:00.000-08:00

CROSSING GENRES

The genres of crime and horror have shared a fond place in my heart for a very long time. I was devouring books by both Stephen King and Agatha Christie by age 14.

As a writer of both crime and horror fiction, I sometimes find myself in a difficult position when it comes to marketing, as the two genres do not always fit easily together. Crime fans often don’t read horror, and vice versa. Horror fans like spooky goings-on and things that go bump in the night. Crime fans like the puzzle, the thrill of the chase, the solving of the mystery, but they like their murders to be based in reality, without the added complication of supernatural influences.

To me, the two genres have a great deal in common. Both genres generally have a gruesome death featuring fairly early on. Often in horror, as in crime, there is a hunt for the killer. However, in horror the murderer often turns out to be a supernatural entity, and sometimes there is no motive beyond the fact that the supernatural entity represents evil in its purest form, killing for the sake of killing. In crime, the killer is a human being, no matter how sick and depraved, and there’s generally something motivating them to kill – even in a serial killer novel, where the bad guy is a twisted killer being driven to kill by a primeval hunting instinct.

Good and evil are often common themes in both crime and horror novels. In a crime novel, the ‘good guys’ are the ones solving the crime. The ‘bad guy’ is the killer, who will invariably be caught and brought to justice in the end. In most of Stephen King’s horror novels the ‘bad guy’ is the supernatural entity who is driven to kill, while the ‘good guy’ is the human protagonist who works out what’s going on and is inspired to defeat the protagonist. In Needful Things, however, things are much less clear cut. The “bad guy” is the mysterious shop owner who clearly possesses supernatural powers but the deaths that occur are not by his hand – instead he plays upon the personality flaws of the town’s residents and encourages them to kill each other. None of the victims are particularly ‘bad’ people – they’re just not particularly good, either.

In crime as well there are examples of blurred boundaries. In the “Dexter” novels by Jeff Lindsay the protagonist is a serial killer – someone who is driven to kill and would ordinarily be considered a “bad guy”. Dexter, though, is committed to killing other serial killers – people who kill innocents and therefore, in his mind, could be considered “bad guys”. His strict moral code makes him a sympathetic character, in spite of being a psychopath.

Whatever genre I’m reading – or writing in – I like a well-defined storyline. There has to be a beginning, middle and end. Whoever is committing the murders has to be identified, and stopped. I can live without a happy ending, but I want to be left feeling that justice has been done.

For a long time I felt like I was a lone voice out there in support of both crime and horror, though now we have the highly popular genre of urban fantasy, which combines both – writers like Mike Carey and Jim Butcher have supernatural detectives solving murder mysteries, where the murderer turns out to be a demon or a werewolf or a vampire. So it’s not quite as unusual as it used to be to find people who read both crime and horror. And fans of both genres will often dip into urban fantasy as well.

My love of crime and horror has led me to write in both genres, and in many ways I create more work for myself because I have to work at building up two separate fan bases. The people who read my first book, SUFFER THE CHILDREN, might not necessarily enjoy DEATH SCENE, my amateur sleuth novel (out later this year). On the other hand, those who told me they didn’t read the first book because they don’t like spooky goings-on might be persuaded to read DEATH SCENE – nothing scary here, I can tell them. It’s just a good old-fashioned murder plot.

Writers repeatedly face the dilemma of whether they should write what they want to write, or write for the market. The latter option might in the short-term prove more financially viable. But in the long run, you have to be true to yourself, and I’ve always stuck to writing what I wanted to write, regardless of how popular it is. There was a time in the late 90s and early 2000s when horror was decidedly out of favour, particularly in the UK. Now vampires are back on the scene in a big way, and all the book stores have ‘horror’ sections again. Quite often they are full of urban fantasy books, but no matter – vampires and werewolves and things that go bump in the night are cool again. That’s a good thing for horror writers.

And I find myself meeting more and more cross-genre writers of crime and horror these days, which I find reassuring. It’s always nice to know you’re not the only one out there.

Sara-Jayne Townsend is a UK-based writer of crime and horror. She was born in Cheshire in 1969, but spent most of the 1980s living in Canada after her family emigrated there. She now lives in Surrey with two cats and her husband Chris. She co-founded the T Party Writers’ Group in 1994, and remains Chair Person.

She decided she was going to be a published novelist when she was 10 years old and finished her first novel a year later. It took 30 years of submitting, however, to fulfil that dream. Her first novel, SUFFER THE CHILDREN, was published as an e-book by Lyrical Press, Inc. in 2010. Her next book, DEATH SCENE, is the first in a series about amateur sleuth and Canadian actress Shara Summers, and will be released as an e-book by Lyrical Press, Inc. later this year.

You can learn more about Sara and her writing at her website at http://sarajaynetownsend.weebly.com or her blog at http://sayssara.wordpress.com.

Author's Blog Month: Pamela Turner

2011-02-17T20:09:00.000-08:00

“Exploring the Dark Side of Relationships in Death Sword”

by Pamela Turner

When I first wrote Death Sword, the relationship between Xariel and Karla was pretty straight forward. The problem? Xariel’s role wasn’t exactly heroic. In fact, he was the antagonist. How could I justify Karla falling in love with someone who murdered without compunction?

Don’t ask.

So I dismantled my first draft, leaving only the framework (the initial premise). I changed characters’ roles. Samael, a minor character in the original manuscript, became the antagonist. Xariel was now the hero, albeit a reluctant one.

But if Samael was the adversary what motivated his actions? Why would he despise Karla to the point of murdering her friends?

Then it came to me. What if Samael’s motive was triggered by his inability to let go of his relationship with Xariel? Not only that, what if Xariel was cursed by the Seraphim so he couldn’t act on his sexual needs? He doesn’t want to return to Samael but still desires other males. The problem is his sex curse forces him to be with women, including Karla. The catch? The women he sleeps with are killed, victims of Samael’s curse. The dilemma then, for Xariel, is while he does have some feelings for Karla, these are compounded by his fear she’ll die and he’ll be forced to return to Samael.

Since this is an urban fantasy/paranormal, I’m not restricted in how my characters deal with their relationships. Death Sword is the first in a planned four-book series and Xariel’s sex curse is explored throughout. Ultimately, the characters will find their HEA endings or at least their HFNs.

Even Samael.

When she’s not being her cat’s human scratching post, Pam can be found subverting notions of good and evil and tormenting her characters. Death Sword, her first book, is published by Lyrical Press and is available from the publisher, as well as Amazon (Kindle), Barnes and Noble (Nook), Fictionwise and other online retailers. For more information visit Lyrical Press (www.lyricalpress.com) or the author’s site (http://pamelaturner.net).

Author's Blog Month: Celtic Valentine Romance by Cornelia Amiri

2011-02-11T17:49:00.000-08:00

Celtic Valentine Romance

by Cornelia Amiri

The holiday of love, will soon be upon us and Celtic/Romance and Valentine Day go together quite nicely. After all Saint Valentine rests in the Emerald Isle. In 1835, when visiting Rome, an Irish Carmelite, John Spratt, renowned for his preaching skill was honored by Pope Gregory XVI, with the token of the remains of Saint Valentine. John Spratt brought them to rest at the church he’d built to Our Lady of Mount Carmel at Whitefriar Street in Dublin. The shrine housing St. Valentine is visited by couples in love throughout the year.

Even in ancient times love and marriage were held in high esteem by the Celts, so much so, they had more types of recognized marriages than any other culture. Under the Brehon (Brehoon) laws of Ireland, there were not one, but 10 types of marriage. I’ll list them.

1. The man and wife contributed an equal amount of property or finances.

2. A woman moved to the man's property and contributed little or nothing financially but managed the housekeeping.

3. A man moved to the woman’s property and contributed little or nothing financially but managed her cattle and her fields.

4. The husband and wife both had property and managed their own individually, but the children's rights were still safeguarded.

5. By mutual consent the man and woman shared their bodies, but lived under separate roofs. I call that the have your cake and eat it too marriage.

6. A man abducted the wife of a defeated enemy. So the woman came to that marriage as a spoil of war.

7. The man and woman got together only for one night of sex. In modern times we have a slang expression for this relationship, we call it a one night stand. The Celts had an expression as well, they called it a soldier's marriage.

8. A man seduced a woman by lying to her or by taking advantage of her while she was drunk.

9. A union by forcible rape. The ancient tale of Camma and Sinorix detail what Celtic women felt about this marriage. After Sinorix killed Camma’s husband and forced her to wed him, Camma put poison in the ceremonial wedding cup which they both drank from together. Vengeance against Sinorix was more important than her own life. She used the marriage as a means for revenge.

10. Both the man and woman were either feeble-minded or insane.

The Welsh, under the laws of Hywell (whowell) the Good, had the same types of marriages as the Irish, except for number ten.

All types of banter must have occurred regarding these marriages. Going by the way I numbered the marriages, instead of Yo Mama, they might have said something like, “Oh, you must have been born from a number ten marriage.” And they could have more than one spouse, so an ancient Celtic man or woman could have several combinations of marriages.

Can you imagine meeting someone and asking not “are you married?” But “what number marriage do you currently have?”

They might reply, “Oh, I have a number one and a number five and of course a couple of number sevens.”

And I thought modern day dating was complicated.

To modern man, it seems silly or even cruel to refer to some of these unions as marriages. But it isn’t, because these marriages were not for the benefit of the man or woman, they were for the protection of the children. By recognizing all these unions as legal marriages, the Celts insured there were no illegitimate children. A child born of any of the 10 unions would inherit like any of their parents’ other children. Also the land did not go to the eldest son. The estate was split between all children including the daughters.

Handfasting was another type of Celtic union, it lasted for only a year and a day. It predominantly took place at Lughnassadh (LOO-nahs-ah), the Celtic Harvest festival, celebrated August 1. Single men lined up on one side and unmarried women on the other. They paired off and married for a year and a day. The couple’s wrists were literally tied together during the ceremony. This is where we get the expression "tying the knot". The couple had to return to the same place the following year to make their marriage permanent. They could also end the union at that time by simply standing back to back, facing north and south, and walking out. Going their separate ways, single once more.

Fruit gathering was also part of Lughnassadh. And this was romantically done as young men and women paired off to pick bilberries and didn’t return until nightfall. This included the sweet custom of boys threading the berries into bracelets for the girls to wear that day.

Another important festival for the ancient Celts was Beltaine (bell-tayn), which in modern times we call May Day. The May Queen led the Beltane procession with her ritual courtship of the Green Man. These symbolic marriages of the god and goddess, in the form of King and Queen of the May, were mirrored in human courtship. One of the most popular May Day traditions was to set a basket full of spring flowers or other small gifts at a neighbor’s house without them seeing you. If you got caught, they would chase and then kiss you. Courtships for the ancient Celts would often begin at Beltaine and the marriages would be held at Samhain (Sah-van), which in modern times we call Halloween.

Samhain, as the beginning of the New Year, was the main season of weddings for the ancient Celts. A tradition that survived in Wales, in Montgomeryshire, was on Samhain they made a mash of nine ingredients: potatoes, carrots, turnips, peas, parsnips, leeks, pepper, salt and new milk. A wedding ring was hidden in the mash. Teenage girls dug into the mash with wooden spoons, anxious to learn their fate, for the one who found the ring would be the first one married. The way it was done in Carmarthenshire, was that on Samhain, nine girls made a pancake together, containing nine ingredients, divided it among themselves, and ate it. Before dawn, each girl would have a vision of her future husband.

So you can see romance was as important in ancient Celtic times as it is today. For as the poets say . . . love is timeless.

For the blog contest today, the winner will receive a 2011 calendar of Hot Houston Texas Fireman, and I had it autographed by two of them – Kirk & Marc.

That sultry eye-candy will definitely keep you warm in this cold spell. To enter just post a comment and include an email I can reach you at. Also for more Celtic/Romance please visit my website at http://celticromancequeen.com/

Author's Month: Writing the Compelling Female Character by Charlotte Ivory

2011-02-07T22:38:00.000-08:00

Writing the Compelling Female Character (that people WANT to read)

Goldfish in Space has an original, clever plot which continues to surprise up to the last page. The author shows a sophisticated command of wit, and at some points his narrative caused this reviewer to laugh out loud. However, the characters were clichéd and unrelatable, and it was often hard to guess their motivations. Reading their interactions was rather like viewing a social event for store mannequins.

Ouch.

One of the toughest challenges for an author is to create strong characters. While we may easily create whole new worlds, magic systems, parallel dimensions, and even alternate histories, populating these places with well-rounded, multi-faceted characters can often be just a hair’s-breadth out of reach.

This is especially so with female characters, because we are so often presented with very characterised images in mainstream media. For example, here are a few female image stereotypes that might be currently hard-wired into your brain:

· young career woman who wants nothing more than a pay rise and a pair of Jimmy Choos
· angry, ass kicking Lara Croft type
· dizzy blonde bimbette
· no-nonsense, prudish, uptight librarian/law student super-brain

Because these stereotypes are so recognisable, we respond quickly to the clichés that suggest them. So if a story starts with: “Damn – I’d broken another nail. I wondered if I had time before drinks at the Malibu Bar to fit in a mani-pedi – perhaps if I skipped lunch...”, the reader’s mind starts connecting with the young career woman type.

The trouble is that as writers, we’re trying to create people on the page – not types. I mean, when was the last time someone said to you, “I’m just your typical middle manager buying a red sports car to ease me through his mid-life crisis”? Not likely – most people will go out of their way to remind you of what makes them an individual. And why? Because individuals are interesting; types aren’t.

Most writers I know do not set out to create a type when they’re writing a female protagonist, or female secondary character. We want to create a compelling female character (CFC, if I may shorten it). But you know, we’re only human: we get lazy sometimes.

Being the eager-to-please bunnikins that I am, I’ve compiled a list of prompts to help you avoid the cardboard cut-out female, and instead breathe life into a fully-fledged CFC that readers will relate to and like. The list is by no means exhaustive, but will hopefully get you thinking about all the many and varied depths of your own CFC.

1. Make her realistic and let her dream. Perhaps these seem mutually exclusive, but they’re not. After all, you’re realistic, aren’t you? And you have dreams too. So should your CFC. Give her all sorts of odd dreams and aspirations, not just those which fit neatly into your story (she doesn’t just want to find the Grindstone of Doom, she also wants to learn tap dancing). You don’t have to make a big deal of this in your novel – it may not even find its way in – but just knowing this about your character will make her more real to you. If she’s real to you, she’s more likely to be real to your reader.

2. Make her rational, and let her have emotions. Again, just like *gasp* a real woman. Presumably you’re not aspiring to write about a dumb-dumb, so make use of the brains you’ve given her. In a mystery, for example, have her make some of the realisations, instead of just going along with the male sleuth. Put her one step ahead of her counterparts now and then. On the other hand, don’t transform her into the stereotype of the robotic, emotionless android. There’s nothing more annoying than a character that shows no emotions. Look at Sigourney Weaver in the Alien movies. She was very rational; cool, calm and collected. But remember in Alien Resurrection, when she discovered the suffering Ripley clones and torched the lab? That was a good moment for the franchise.

3. Make her self-possessed, and let her have moments of insecurity. Let’s face it: deep down we’re all a little insecure. But we put on a brave face and tough it out. Why should your CFC be any different? My character Isabel would never let anyone see her cry. But twice in my novel she heads off to her room to have a little weep – and deservedly so; everyone around her is dropping like flies and it’s probably her fault.

4. Make her respect men, and let her interact with them in a way not confined to “sexual tension.” Remember that the CFC is not defined by how she reacts to men – she’s defined by how she reacts to everything. And if you think back to all the men you’ve talked to/seen in the last week, how many of these interactions were defined by sexual tension? Probably not many. And your CFC is the same: she’s not going around wowing the bus driver with a beautifully arched eyebrow, nor is she exchanging delicious double-entendre with the guy at the DMV.

5. Make her respect women, and let her interact with them in ways that you wouldn’t see on a commercial. There is a neat little thing called the Bechdel test, which is designed for movies, but I think works equally well for books. A movie passes the Bechdel test if it satisfies the following requirements:

It has to have at least two women in it,
Who talk to each other (a real conversation)
About something other than a man.

Sounds simple enough, right? But actually there are a good proportion of Hollywood blockbusters which would fail this test – they’d often stumble at the first hurdle, because there is only one female character (along with one black guy, and one fat person thrown in for comic relief. Le sigh.)

I would add to this that the women in your story shouldn’t only talk about getting stains out of clothes; perfect pie crusts; shoes, makeup or fashion; they shouldn’t be bitching about another woman; or comparing their children. But, you know, that’s just me...

6. If you make her physically strong, show why. It’s fine, and in my opinion desirable, to have a female character who can kick ass. But if she’s a skinny Minnie who is constantly on a diet and never goes to the gym, how is this going to happen? Superpowers, I’ll give you that. But if she’s in the ordinary world and working against ordinary physics, you need to justify why she can do kung fu. Does she go to the dojo three times a week for sparring? (And did I just mix up kung fu and karate?)

7. If she has a “bad attitude”, show why. I’ve had bad attitudes in my life before. But they were usually to do with a meanie boss, or a lack of sleep, or a bad cappuccino. They weren’t a life-long condition. People who have life-long bad attitude are a bit meh, if you ask me. I mean, would she still be frowning on the roller coaster at Disneyland? (Is it even possible to scowl and say “wheeeeee” at the same time?) Anyway, my point is that a perpetual bad attitude is an oddity. If your character has a “chip on her shoulder”, show why. Make it believable that someone would permanently walk around looking like she lost a pound and found a penny.

8. Give her a variety of interests, outside of saving the world/finding the murderer/falling in love. Real people have real interests. CFCs are probably even more likely to have interests, because they’re smart and engaged with the world. Have her play the cello. Better yet, have her play it badly, but really want to improve. Maybe she fancies herself an entrepreneur, and secretly plays the stock market with a ridiculously small amount of money, convinced that one day she’ll hit the jackpot. Perhaps she knows everything there is to know about local birdlife, and is saving up for a pair of high-resolution binoculars.

9. Make her fair, and make her fallible. No one is perfect, but most of us strive to be good. And one quality that people universally admire is fairness. So have your CFC show this quality. But not too much: after all, she’s a real person, and real people are terrible hypocrites. (I, for example, judge other people’s spelling and grammar errors, but it just took me three attempts to spell the word “fallible”.)

10. Don’t make her beautiful. Please, oh please, don’t make her beautiful. This is not to say that every CFC should be plain. But the fact is that very few of us are GOR-geous. More likely we’re interesting and captivating, or quirky and cute, or shining with an inner radiance that makes us stand out from the other people on the bus. Fans of Flight of the Conchords will remember the song “The Most Beautiful Girl in the Room” where the object of Jemaine’s affection is “one of the top three girls on the street... depending on the street” and likened to “a part-time model... but you’d probably still have to keep your day job”. In my opinion, this is the level of hawt-ness we should be aiming for with our CFCs: compelling, and attractive enough that someone might, one day, think up some odd song lyrics, but not so ridiculously beautiful that cars crash when she walks down the street.

11. Give her a moral dilemma that she can’t solve. Ah, the fun of torturing our characters! But it’s not just for sadistic reasons: an ethical dilemma will give you a chance to show the moral fibre of your CFC. And if she can’t solve the problem, all the better. She’s getting more believable by the moment.

12. Let her recognise her limits – and push them anyway. There’s nothing more relatable than seeing the CFC fail at something. And there’s nothing more admirable than seeing her pick herself up, brush herself off, and try again.

13. Give her an overriding passion or fear. This should be something that she wants/fears more than anything – but it’s not necessarily what she is working for in the story itself. For example, in my novel, Unseemly Conduct, the protagonist Isabel has an overriding passion to provide financial stability for herself – after being on the precipice of ruin and starvation, she knows how precarious her station in life is. It is this overriding passion/fear of poverty that allows her to be manipulated by the police detective Inspector Dennehy. Even after the story finishes, your CFC’s overriding passion will remain.

14. If possible, give her a family. They don’t have to be a nuclear family (hubby, kids and dog in the SUV). Oftentimes CFCs are loners, so an immediate family doesn’t factor into it. But everyone comes from somewhere, and your CFC’s back story will be richer for having a family. A dementia-affected aunt that she was frightened of as a child; a cousin who died of leukaemia; a bullying older brother: All of these things will have left their effect on your CFC.

15. Give her an addiction. It could be to coffee, chocolate peanuts, alcohol, buying antique books, having a foot massage – something that, if she’s offered it, takes serious strength of will to pass up. Sometime’s she’ll pass the test of will – sometimes she won’t. Real people aren’t predictable and neither is your CFC.

16. Give her opinions on the world. Not just the storyline that’s rolling out before her. Give her opinions on politics, the environment, immigration – whatever. It doesn’t matter whether you’re writing in this world or another; whether you’re creating an historical or a contemporary. These opinions don’t have to make it into the story, but if you know her opinions, you’ll be writing a multi-faceted, rounded character.

Finally, dear author, if you feel your female character may falling back into cliché territory, get some inspiration via this YouTube video: Joss Whedon, the creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, answers the question “Why do you write such strong female characters?” (His part starts about 2 minutes in, after the Meryl Streep introduction).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYaczoJMRhs

Charlotte Jane Ivory is a writer of Historical Mysteries, Gothic Thrillers, and her own brand of "Victorianoir". She's a living, breathing warning of what happens when you have one foot in the twenty-first century, and one in the nineteenth. Represented by the Donald Maass Literary Agency, her current projects include a Victorian London murder mystery, a noir thriller about London gang wars during the mid 19th century, and - surprising even to her - a satirical fantasy novel.

http://steamandink.blogspot.com

Author's Month Guest Blog: Nerine Dorman

2011-02-06T09:34:00.000-08:00

There’s a bit of an odd story attached to The Namaqualand Book of the Dead’s origin. During my husband’s wilder days, he shacked up with one of Cape Town’s more colourful personalities, a chap by the name of Lucien, and they lived in a succession of apartments in the city. Lucien was full of stories and we could never truly believe any of the tales he shared, but I remember clearly one night, me and Lucien were up talking (this is after I’d met and married my husband, and he’d moved out from beneath Lucien’s roof) and we’d discussed me writing a character for him for one of my novels.

Nothing ever came of this until much later, when a certain disreputable chap by the name of Vivienne started pitching up in my novels, but Lucien passed away a few years ago before he ever heard that I’d put Vivienne into my stories, and that is where the matter would have ended.

That was until I was walking down the street one winter, and I bumped into a man who looked just like Lucien. We stood and stared at each other for a good few heartbeats. I just couldn’t be sure it was him. He was supposed to be dead, after all. But he was also the type who would fake his own death, so I couldn’t be sure. The man turned his back on me and I carried on walking. It was just one of those weird situations.

But it got me thinking, one of those “what if” scenarios, and slowly but surely the seeds of the story started taking shape until I was ready to outline my novella.

To this day, I wouldn’t put it past Lucien to have faked his own death, though his reasons for doing so would not be nearly as dramatic as the kinds of scenarios I end up writing about.

A small South African West Coast village features prominently in The Namaqualand Book of the Dead. Lambert’s Bay is really almost in the middle of nowhere. It’s about three-and-a-half hours’ drive from Cape Town along the N7, driving north toward the Orange River and the South African/Namibian border. You could almost say it’s our version of the Wild West. There really isn’t much going on up there, besides a number of scattered small towns that survive largely on agriculture (where there is water) or mining. About the biggest annual event is the spring floral display. If I were to hide anywhere, Lambert’s Bay would be pretty high up on my list of places where no one would think to look for me.

Many years ago, when I was convalescing from some pretty serious abdominal surgery, my parents took me there for a four-night breakaway, and the place thrilled me on so many levels. I just knew, even back then, that I wanted to put this little fishing village in my novels one day.

Part of my day-job involves travel writing, so it was only a natural conclusion that I’d like to share an almost travelogue-like experience with my readers, taking them on a journey through some of the most beautiful and dramatic scenery in the Western Cape.

My protagonist, Chloë, meets a number of people along her way, but the one who stands out the most is Gladys, a middle-aged woman who’s a young soul trapped in an older woman’s body. To be perfectly honest, I’m not quite sure where Gladys springs from, except that she has a penchant for filching other people’s cigarettes, has purple hair and drives a 1970s Ford Fairlane that matches her hair colour.

I think she’s born out of an idea, a dream of mine, that if I were to drive the N7 in any car, it must be a muscle car. I haven’t quite worked my way there but I’ve a great love for classic vehicles and, after having a spin in a friend of mine’s Fairlane, it was another case of having an element on hand that was absolutely begging to be included in a story.

The Namaqualand Book of the Dead is a story about love, and the lengths one would go to for someone you love. It’s also a cautionary tale about giving up too much of one’s self in the name of love, or having too many attachments to a person, object or place. Although there is a creepy supernatural element to the story, I don’t want to delve too deeply into this for fear of spoilers. I will say this much: I wrote The Namaqualand Book of the Dead during a time when Twilight-fever was at a pitch, as a reaction to a particular way of perceiving relationships.

Read more about The Namaqualand Book of the Dead: http://www.lyricalpress.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=81&products_id=313

Follow my blog here: http://nerinedorman.blogspot.com

Or like my Facebook author page: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Nerine-Dorman-author/173330419365374

Game Review: Dead Space 2

2011-01-30T13:26:00.000-08:00

In my Dead Space 1 review, I strongly criticized the lack of likable characters, the cringe-worthy dialogue, and a story that was for the most part ripped off. I was worried it would be the same for Dead Space 2. It wasn’t helped by the trailers portraying different voice actors for the main character Isaac. In some cases he was a whiny emo and in others he was a deep-throated bad-ass. It was a little jarring.

Well, as it turns out, I didn’t have anything to worry about. Dead Space 2 is a genuinely great game for the most part, with likeable characters and decent dialogue.

After being rescued from the Ishimura, Isaac is committed to a metal asylum for three years and spends most of that time in stasis. He wakes up just as the Necromorphs attack, and what follows is the best ten minutes of a game I’ve ever seen.

The game has a graphical upgrade, but I have to give points to the level designer. There are some really detailed and colourful levels of this game, replacing the bland grey-on-grey of the Ishimura. Unfortunately, the blandness rears its ugly head in the second half of the game. This is arguably because Isaac heads up to the maintenance levels of the game, but it’s still an unwelcome change.

Dead Space 2 is just as difficult, if not more, as its predecessor. Even on a normal difficulty save spots are few and far between, as are supplies. Enemies will swarm you, especially in the second half of the game. GAMEPLAY PRO TIP: I seriously recommend running away from the swarm in some situations. Monsters normally can’t follow you in the next room and you will need as much ammo as you can spare.

As I said before, the dialogue and voice-acting are decent, particularly Nicole’s character. There are also some genuinely bone-chilling moments in this game. My only gripe is to get to those moments you have to do a lot of fighting. There are a few other disappointments as well. There is no extra content besides Dead Space Extraction (which I already had), and I’ve heard that the multiplayer is pretty lame so far. Just a warning.

FINAL GRADE: 4 out of 5. A definite improvement from the first game, and the first half will immerse the player. Unfortunately, the second half starts to get repetitive.

So here’s what I don’t get. Isaac can dismember thousands of creatures, but whenever he fights a human, he either dies instantly or gets captured?

And now, for a cryptic message.....

2011-01-24T21:00:00.000-08:00

Hi guys,

First of all, thanks to all the new people who joined my blog! It's much appreciated and I hope I'm a little entertaining. :)

I have an announcement. Over the next few months there will be......(gasp) changes on this blog!

Nah, it's not that dramatic. These are changes I knew I would have to eventually make from day one when I started this blog. And this is good news, believe me, as I've been waiting a while for some things to happen first and the wait is finally over!

One of the more minor things I might change is the look of this blog. I've never been too fond of how narrow it is. I'll either change that, change the backround, or even the whole template!

Anyone have any suggestions on what they would like to see improved? If you tell me I'll give you a cookie! (in the mail, which will conveniently get lost between the US/Canadian border).

Cheers,
Natasha

Movie Review: T-Force

2011-01-22T10:51:00.000-08:00

Today let's talk about the T-Force!

Um.....no. Not that T-Force. This T-force:

Although if you got the Asylum Films version, (which I do have) the cover looks more like a rip-off of Terminator. This movie stars a group of police officers who are also robots. And this is suprisingly a decent film. I say that even though this is the opening sequence to the movie:

The first twenty minutes of the movie is equally bad, ripping off Die Hard more than anything else. Long story short, T-Force screws up and innocent lives are lost. The mayor demands that the T-Force robots are shut down. All the robots rebel except for one called Caine, and it's up to this one robot and a cop who hates AI to stop them from wiping out the city.

As a science-fiction movie, it fails. As a buddy cop, this movie is surprisingly decent, especially when they get the robots out of the silly uniforms.

The action is pretty decent, and there is some dialogue in this movie that's pretty funny as well. Caine's character is a little compelling as he knows that he has to be shut down after the mission is over. In other words, this movie is stupidly hilarious for the first half, but decent for the second.

FINAL GRADE: 2 stars out of 5. Turn off your brain and enjoy.

In retrospect, this movie probably does have the best opening ever.

Dead Space 2: First Impressions

2011-01-18T18:11:00.000-08:00

Hi guys!

I took a bit of a break from my normal reviews to play the demo of Dead Space 2. To summerize my previous reviews so far, I really didn't like the first game, but I did love the Wii game Dead Space Extraction, which is easily on my top ten list of best horror video games. So how does the demo fare? Well, I jotted down my thoughts below:

The Good: Unlike other video games which like to pretend that their expansion packs don’t exist (ahem, F.E.A.R) Dead Space 2 does actually bring up Dead Space Extraction in their intro. Hopefully we can find out what happened to the main characters in that one.

From the control side, Dead Space 2 has gotten a visual uplift and it looks fantastic. Being on a planet rather than a spaceship, the locations are more artistic and the enemies seem more challenging as well. The controls also seem a little more fluid than the first game and the zero-G is far more fun. Also Isaac Clarke has a voice now. Hopefully a personality will follow, although from what I've seen from the trailer, I'm kind of worried he'll be a little whiny.

The bad: The demo crashed on the first try. Hopefully that won’t be a taste of things to come. And what was up with having me to register an account first before playing a demo? Gah, now I have more spam.

Unfortunately, that annoying music which follows a monster is also back. Yes, I get there’s a monster behind me. You don’t have to use the shrieking violins every time I see one. I’m also a little concerned that the gameplay will overshadow the more subtle parts of Isaac’s madness, but we’ll see.

The ugly: The suits. Ugh, I hate the Dead Space suits. Every time Isaac Clarke enters the upgrade area I keep expecting the Iron Man music to start playing. And what is that part below his neck supposed to do?

So that's my first impressions. I plan to buy the game when it comes out next week, and of course I'll do a full review of the game.

Announcement Time!

2011-01-15T21:37:00.000-08:00

Hi guys!

I have delcared that February is going to be...(drumroll please) 'Writer's Month' on my blog!

What does this mean? This means that next month other writers will be posting blogs here on random days! They can promo their book, talk about writing tips, or even talk about what they had for lunch for half a page. Please note that this includes writers from all genres, not just sci-fi and horror!

If any writer out there is interested, please e-mail me at warofthesoulites@gmail.com, and I'll reserve a spot for you!

Cheers,
Natasha

Game Review: Dead to Rights Retribution

2011-01-11T18:21:00.000-08:00

I'm taking a short break from Asylum Films for a moment to talk about things that are not of such amazing high quality (insert sarcasm here). Today I am reviewing Dead to Rights Retribution, and in my usual tradition, I am reviewing a series completely out of order. Seriously, I don't know why I do that.

This is the plot (sort of): While battling a band of criminals, a Grant City cop named Jack Slate loses his father in a random shoot-out. Enraged, Jack goes rogue and exposes a plot to take over Grant City. And trust me, I am keeping the summary as vague as possible, because if I really explained this jumbled mess this blog would be twice as long.

Dead to Rights Retribution has plenty of problems, starting with the characters. Jack doesn’t have much of a personality other than being an angry cop who lost his dad in a random shooting. And he’s a mass murderer who doesn’t actually arrest anyone.I am being completely serious when I say that there are scenes in this game where a criminal is begging Jack for mercy, who, in response, shoots the guy's kneecaps off. Which brings me to the second problem with this game-at what point did the cops decide to do away with the whole ‘arresting part of the job and decide to murder unarmed people instead? At first I thought this was a problem with Jack alone, but the entire police force seems to support his brutally murderous ways.

Another problem is the number of plotholes. There is no clear reason why Jack decides to go rogue after his dad is shot. Villains are interchangeable and their motivations and plans usually don’t make much sense. One of the more laughable plot holes is that towards the game Jack decides to try the whole ‘arresting’ thing for the first time, a point that rings hollow when Jack decides to use the criminal as a human shield for two levels straight.

The gameplay is just ‘okay’. There’s a good combination of gun fights and melee attacks, but it also suffers from a few annoyances. No one seems to know how to hold a gun properly and can be very easily disarmed. And unfortunately, Jack falls into this category as well and loses his gun so many times it soon becomes irritating. Plus, Jack is really snooty as to where he can or cannot take cover (and gets shot either way). On the other hand, the level design for this game is better than average and reminds me somewhat of Condemned, a game I really love. There is also one other thing about this game, one incredibly awesome part that makes me want to play it again and again. In one word, that is Shadow.

Shadow is Jack’s dog, and he is the best NPC I’ve ever had. This isn’t an NPc that hangs around in the background-Shadow can instantly kill several opponents, usually in cringe-worthy scenes that are actually worse than Jack’s. This isn't a playful pooch-it can easily tear off a limb from a criminal (usually a very personal one if that criminal is a guy).

Why are these two part of the police force again?

FINAL GRADE: 3 Stars out of 5. The gameplay is enjoyable but the plot kills any connection with anything.

Stay tuned for an announcement shortly.

Movie Review: Marked

2011-01-01T12:36:00.000-08:00

Well...dangit, I was hoping to have one more bad movie on this box set to review, but then Asylum Studios decides to croak out something good for once. Don’t get me wrong-this is not a particularly ‘good’ movie, one that I would recommend watching in theatres. A good movie for Asylum Studios means an average one in the real world...or a good movie that has been ripped off exceptionally well. Even stranger, Marked was produced by the same company which also produced Passed the Door of Darkness, and even has some of the same actors. You would think the dialogue is atrocious and I should hate this movie...but I don’t.

The plot is thus-a young woman named Diella survives a rapist attack and her assailant is killed. Years later, Diella is a paranormal investigator who joined the field because she always feels the ghost of her attacker nearby. As it turns out, he somehow marked her and is trying to possess her body, creating an act of ‘pure evil unleashed’ in the process.

As I said, this is an average movie. There are some minor plotholes, and some characters who just badly need to die before they even made it to the concept stage. How this movie works, however, is the relationship the two main characters, Diella and her brother Mitch. Mitch doesn’t believe in the paranormal, but he feels guilty because he wasn’t around to help Diella during her attack years ago. She, on the other hand, believes her brother is a chronic alcoholic and tends to disregard his help, even when it’s perfectly logical.

However, this movie has a few flaws, primarily subplots that go nowhere. Somehow an evil cult sprang out of this movie. Why? Because they think it would be cool to see Diella possessed I guess. There’s another subplot with one of the investigators becoming a cynic, and it doesn’t pay off in any way. Plus the movie has a weird fascination of inserting grainy effects during spooky scenes, which look overall jarring. The ending, however, is pretty interesting.

FINAL GRADE: 2 out of 5. Average, but it’s more than what I usually expect from Asylum Studios.

And that concludes my four movie package. I will never have to review another movie from Asylum Studios again. Whew, what a nightmare! Hm...what’s this unopened box near the Christmas tree? Another present? That’s so swe-AAAAHHHHHHH!

Movie Review: Skeleton Man

2010-12-22T20:11:00.000-08:00

Blogger's note: Spoilers for the movie.

This is the fourth movie in the Asylum Studios Package, and I haven't mentioned how boring I find their start-up menu yet. It's an uninspiring blob of color, and I can do better with five minutes and photoshot. And it's on every single movie created by Asylum Studios, not just this disc. Naturally there are no special features.

Anyway, this is the third movie, and yes, we are still crashing down the ladder of quality. As much as I hate 'Passed the Door of Darkness' at least that movie could figure out how to master camera angles. It also had a plot I could somewhat take seriously.

In the Skeleton Man, a small group of army personnel who are training in a park disappear, followed by a search-and-rescue team. (I'm tempted to do a Hot Shots 2 joke about the men getting the men out who tried to get the men out, but whatever). So naturally, since the army has lost not one but two teams, they now flood the park with several combat personnel, perhaps working with the local police and SWAT to find their missing troops, and I dunno, maybe getting some helicopters to scout the area first?

Or maybe they could send in yet another team, one that's a little more dumber. They have never met each other before today, and they go undercover in civilian clothing, because...that's the last thing the trees would be expecting? And trust me, the more time I watch these actors, the more I realize how much they are not army material.

Anyway these people get hunted by a creature. There's actually something really familiar about this set-up: A group of people walking through a forest being hunted by a creature with thermal vision. I really got deja vu when this chick says 'If it breathes, we can kill it'. Eh, I'm probably just imagining things. Because as we all know, Asylum Studios would never rip off anything.

Only this time, the commandos are not being hunted by any normal 'predators'. Instead they are hunted by.....

...Skeletor for some reason. Who cannot be killed by bullets, so naturally the team spends most of the movie trying to shoot him. His motivations for hunting the team are not really explained. It is established that a group of archeologists found his skull somewhere at the beginning of the movie. After that he kills the archeologists and gets his skull back in the first five minutes. And then...he really badly wants to kill army people in a park somewhere?

At times, this movie is hilariously random. During one scene, this team of top-notch commandos are about to go to sleep. Since it's been established that previous teams disappear one member at a time, our protagonist immediately breaks off from the rest of the group, walks for an unknown time in the park, finds a road, spots Skeletor somehow, steal's a guys truck, drives down the road while Skeletor helpfully walks across it, misses Skeletor, explodes the truck, crawls away, gets sliced by the Skeletor, lies in the ground for an hour, then gets accidently shot and killed by his teammates afterwards. Even Skeletor is sometimes random, hunting the team one scene, then going to a never-established warehouse and killing everyone there a scene later.

How does this movie end? Since bullets fail, the remaining survivors trap him inside an exploding building. Yeah, I'm sure that will work. I will say this movie did manage to startle me a little towards the end, with the credits suddenly rewound itself. Congratulations Skeleton Man, you managed to provoke a reaction other than laughter.

FINAL GRADE: 1 out of 5. Aside from the long, drawn-out shots of people running, this movie could almost pass for a comedy.

How did Skeletor manage to take down a chopper with a bow and arrow, anyway?

Movie Review: Passed the Door of Darkness

2010-12-19T10:22:00.000-08:00

As I said before, I am willing to forgive Fear Chamber for most of its faults, because that movie at least has a plot that makes sense and dialogue that doesn't make me want to throw my laptop off the balcony. No, that honor belongs to a movie called 'Passed the Door of Darkness'. Yeah, that title just rolls off the tongue doesn't it?

In concept the movie sounds interesting: Two 'buddy' cops are pitted against a serial killer who kills his victims with elaborate traps, usually triggered by a loved one opening the door.

In order for people to understand why I really hate this movie, I really have to explain how the buddy cop films usually play out: two police officers of different viewpoints are forced to work together. They spend a great deal of time arguing over these viewpoints, but usually come to some understanding and mutual respect. Most of these scenarios are played out by a rookie hot-headed cop, and a cool-headed veteran cop.

Not in this film, though. In this one the rookie cop (Malloy) and veteran cop (MacCasey) argue, and argue, and argue, and chew through some awful dialogue, swear at each other, then argue some more right to the finish. There is nothing likeable or redeemable about these two characters. One is just foot-in-the-mouth stupid and the other is more than a little crazy, enough that the audience thinks this is the actual killer (but of course, it's a red herring). There is an angry police chief in this movie, but he's too busy trying to figure out what kind of drugs his officers are on most of the time.

It really doesn't help that the dialogue in this movie is simply atrocious and most of the time painful. As an example, this is the very first scene with the two detectives in the restaurant.

MacCasey: It's too damn hot in here.

Malloy: I'm not hot. Where the hell do you put all that food? Nice hat. Is it new?

MacCasey: (silence)

Malloy: I know we haven't gotten to know each other in the last few couple of days McCaisy. But...I dunno, maybe you're on to something with your whole 'thing.' Maybe we outta be working to change the face of the department. Bring back the days when the detectives have class.

MacCasey: It's best to keep one's trap shut and be thought an idiot then blather on and prove it.

And it goes downhill from there.

Unlike Fear Chamber, the paranormal subplot is downplayed to almost nothing. There is some suspicion that the murderer might be a ghost or the devil, but when the truth is revealed, I have to wonder why this movie was put in the horror genre at all. I will admit that some of the gore is actually pretty stomach-turning, so I can give it half a point for that.

The ending to this film is just horrible, and does its best to rip off Fight Club. However, the more I think about why this person would be a killer, the more it just doesn't make any sense. It also doesn't make any sense what this character does to his girlfriend afterwards, a woman he genuinely loves.

FINAL GRADE: ½ out of 5. It feels like I'm missing some vital plot points from watching this movie, but I think that's because the writers forgot to add them in. Overall this movie is horrible, and icky.

And of course, it's always a great sign that your movie is awesome when the website has thirty viruses in it...